What Goes Around Comes Around
by autorai
Summary: After a few months of peaceful living for Shizuo Heiwajima, Izaya returns to torment him again. However the blonde refuses to stand for it this time and finally catches and delivers what's deserved to Izaya. Rated M for violence and possible yaoi.
1. Finally Won

**I've never written a Durarara fic and honestly haven't written anything in around two or three months now due to personal reasons so my writing might be a little shaky. Also to anyone who's read/is reading Believe in Me, I will update, I promise, I just need some time to think about where the story will head off to. This is a one shot, at least I think it is, I just figured that Izaya sort of deserved more than a black eye for his many trollings so wrote this to give that. I don't own anything, not the amazing characters, not the city, nothing at all except the way these words were strung together. Anyways, thank you for reading, have a nice night. ^^ Or day. Or anything really. **

Powerful chilled winds slipped through the small cavern between his moderately smooth vest and the crisp, white, long-sleeved shirt that was resting underneath, the rippling clothing creating a soothing effect on the wearer. It had been an estimated three months (he wasn't one to keep track of time) since the gang war and the mass panic in Ikebukuro had slowed to a gentle stop. Never had it been so peaceful for so long and Shizuo realized that he rarely got as angry as he previously did anymore. With Izaya Orihara gone as the sneaky male had promised on that heavenly day where he admitted to planning to leave town after the massive effort Shizuo had placed to force him to go away there was a cool chill to the city that made it feel different in a way. Now the excitement had fallen asleep, going dormant into a state of quaint relaxation. People paid their taxes the second Tom asked so there was little need to toss whatever large object was available at anyone, the color gangs had either vanished completely or gone into hiding so there were less crimes and less chances of getting shot like he had been at the climax of the gang war… It was safe, though rather dull, but dullness was a quality that Shizuo wasn't going to complain about. It was better than the alternative. Excitement attracted fleas after all, and there was one particular bug that he didn't want to ever have to exchange glances with again.

The skies were clear besides a few mildly grey clouds predicting a chance of rain in the far, far future scattered about the endless, toneless blue. The blonde was leaning against the almost uncomfortably textured wall in wait for the tax collector to exit from his job, only really there to supervise in case a debtor grew agitated and attacked and, with the peaceful times as of late, there was no real need for him to stand as a threat indoors. Honey eyes focused mindlessly into the depths of the teal sky from behind the shade of purple-tinted glasses, the illuminated lights in the windows of the skyscrapers that pierced the air with their towering glory not comparing enough to the sun, which was probably shyly hiding behind some building since it's radiance wasn't directly visible. Despite the winter months coming to a closure it was still cold enough, and each gust of wind sent a small, involuntary shiver up his spine. He had refused as he always did to change out of his bartender's clothes, the clothes his brother had given him and the clothes that were the small piece of the future he had shattered that he could still control. It defeated the purpose to wear them if he didn't even have the job anymore and wouldn't get it ever again (drunks pissed him off) but for some reason he felt more comfortable with the tie and vest than with a warm jacket to resist the chill. It was quiet, or at least as quiet as it could be in the city. Car horns and wheels squealed all around, chatter clamored through the slightly polluted air, and all forms of noise echoed around him, but after living in Ikebukuro for so long sounds like that seemed to dull to almost nothing. There were no voices nearby and no cars nearby, it was a thin street and was rarely traveled upon by those who didn't know better. Tom would be in the building for a while with these sorts of people, but the man had asked Shizuo not to cause any difficulty with these particular clients and in all honesty the taller man of the two hardly cared. In the meantime he could smoke and zone out and enjoy the span of time he had not having to erupt into a violent beast. How wrong had he been. He shouldn't have spoken so simply.

"Shizu-chan…!" His eyes snapped open and with that single voice the calm had shattered into a torrent, a storm inside of him that he had auto-set to attempt to calm himself. No. There was no way that idiot was back. He had learned his lesson, the town, no the world hated him and he was better off just staying out. But to his disdain Shizuo glanced over slowly to see a cocky grin from across the pavement, raven hair that had just barely grown in length since its last appearance, and the single bastard that could set him off by simply existing. "Izaya..." The blonde growled in return, his eyes narrowing and his teeth gritting around the burnt-out cigarette, the force automatically dropping the rolled paper to sizzle on the ground at his feet, only to be stomped on by a heavy heel that ground it to dust into the concrete. Right when he thought he was through with that _flea_ the damned thing had returned to torment him further. "I thought I told you…" Right away his hands reached out and gripped around a stop sign that was within grasp, the metal of the pole crunching under his fingers as if it were of the same material as a tin can. Izaya's smirk slowly widened to show a glint of white teeth on his cat-like expression, a knife slipping out of his sleeve and into his awaiting hand as if he had both anticipated and prepared beforehand for the fight yet to come. "…to never set foot in Ikebukuro…" And with a fierce snarl and monstrous strength the large, heavy sign was sent flying with perfect accuracy towards the dark-haired man. "…again!" But, as if he had also timed the speed of the projectile, Izaya had lunged to the side, making his motions appear as if he put no effort into them, easily dodging the sign with a laugh as it crashed and scraped against the ground, eventually coming to a stop forcefully against a wall. "You're too mean, Shizu-chan! I only came to say hello, it's not polite to be so rude to an old friend. It got too boring just hiding," he teased as he, with no issue at all, avoided multiple other chunks and pieces of metal and whatever else the powerful man had within reach to chuck at him, a playful atmosphere around him despite anyone else in their right minds behind scared to death of Shizuo Heiwajima. Perhaps he just wasn't in his right mind. The brunette had questioned this for a few days, concluding that he honestly didn't care. "I'm going to kill you this time for sure, Izaya-kun!" The name was drawn out as the blonde hissed his words out, his own murderous grin coming forth as an almost crazed expression took over his previously calm and uncaring tone. He didn't hear or expect a response as he tossed the bright yellow hood of an unfortunate car towards the faster of the two who front flipped over it as if it _weren't flying twice as high as the man was tall._ The flea wasn't just fast, he was stealthy as hell, and within a split second Izaya had retaliated, racing forward and with one quick slice there was a slight sting at his stomach. Glancing downwards he saw the glint of the knife's metal in the sunlight, half submerged into his gut, stained with a red liquid that was running through a large tear in his vest. Though it hurt a little that was nothing… but his vest… "You little…" Izaya chuckled as he jerked his knife away, jumping backwards just in time to avoid having his arm grabbed and crushed by an angry hand, flicking his blade so that the blood flung off the point and onto the ground. "I thought you were going to kill me. You've gotten weaker, Shizu-chan." His carefree tone lowered halfway through his sentence to something more predatory, a glint in his slightly narrowed eyes indicating that, despite the playful act, this time he was serious. He was back and, as always, was prepared to kill if necessary.

Then something even further unexpected happened. As Shizuo gripped onto the concrete block of wall beside him, ready to tear the entire building down to find another piece of heavy material to throw at the stupid rat, there was a small buzz that echoed from his opponent's form. They were both obviously surprised, freezing up mid-motion, as Izaya reached down and slipped his grey phone from his pocket. This was the perfect chance, Shizuo thought with a hopeful spirit boosting in him, tossing a hunk of the outside of the building he had been leaning on before the flea showed up at the designated target, just to have it avoided again. Izaya, without even taking his focus off of the tiny, bright screen, simply leaned to the side and allowed the grey stone to soar barely past his shoulder. Dropping the phone back into his pocket he sighed and turned away, glancing over his shoulder with his hand raised in a symbol similar to a peace sign, as if he were waving Shizuo off. "Sorry, Shizu-chan, work is calling. I'll deal with you later," he chimed before taking off down the street. "Oh no you don't…" The blonde growled as he immediately rushed after. He was going to kill him. Tear him to pieces and finally hear that arrogant, manipulative jerk suffer before killing him for all of the terrible things he did to both himself and all of his friends. Izaya was faster and both of them equally knew their way around the city, Shizuo from experience and Izaya from his reliable research, but experience won out. Izaya, to the angered man's knowledge, hadn't personally been in this specific area before, which worked out well for him. While the flea knew of the streets and the way they were aligned, some insane impairment probably working in his, Shizuo admitted, brilliant mind to give him the ability to trace the city so easily, he didn't know about certain chinks in the environment, such as a stack of large metal crates that had fallen out of a truck near an alley and hadn't been retrieved for years. Rounding a corner to avoid a dead end, Izaya's sharp reflexes alerted him of these boxes in time enough to jump over them, but just barely not quick enough to miss all of them. The quick male tripped, falling forward and landing hard enough on his back on the dusty, dark pavement to sweep the air out of his lungs.

This was perfect for Shizuo who was right at the smaller man's tail, knowing of the boxes and being able to lunge over them in just a few footsteps, grinning in enraged victory as he saw Izaya just hit the ground. As the information broker quickly attempted to scramble back to his feet the blonde jumped down, landing directly on the brunette and closing a tight fist around his neck, pinning him down so that he wouldn't be able to rush away again. He'd finally done it. Izaya was here, struggling both for air and freedom, his life in Shizuo's hands. He could finally get payback, he had finally won. With a devious smirk and wide eyes filled with an extreme amount of terrifying and sadistic ideas the blonde raised the hand that had Izaya's neck in a tight grip, lifting the lighter man and slamming him against the wall of the alley. The noise that the flea made, the cough of slight pain and surprise, was one he wanted to hear again and again until his ears bled from it. Finally. Finally! "Who's weaker now, Izaya-kun?!" He laughed dominantly as he slammed his fist into the info broker's gut. Izaya choked for breath, kicking out in a flailing attempt to jab Shizuo but hardly putting enough force into it to make a difference against the larger, nearly invincible man's body. Another punch came, the shock still evident in the brunette's eyes. His plan never failed, no one had ever caught him, he was always right. But this time his plan had gone down the drain and the man he had pissed off the most had him right here in his grasps. Another cough rang out through the street as another punch slammed forward, then another, a rain of gasping and small cries of pain that Shizuo realized he was quickly growing addicted to hearing. "How does it feel, Izaya-kun? Does it hurt, Izaya-kun? Tell me!" he laughed as he finally grew slightly bored of creating the same motion each time and threw his opponent back to the ground. Izaya skidded along the street, groaning slightly as he had taken multiple hits from a man that could easily lift a vending machine and had no small amount of strength rushing through his bones and veins. He attempted to stand but quickly collapsed to his knees, hugging his stomach and coughing up blood, a liquid he hadn't seen from his own body in years. This amused him; the game was still fun, even if he lost for a split second he would come back and succeed later, he always did. But Shizuo had different plans. Storming to the man and digging his fingers into a nest of soft, black hair he slammed Izaya's head to the ground and stepped on it, grinding his foot into the man's cheek to stimulate how it felt to be dragged along the road after getting hit by a truck, an experience that had happened to him twice now by the info-broker's plan. "S.. stop..!" the brunette muttered, his voice tinged with a tone that Shizuo hadn't heard before, something along the lines of pleading. He felt an overwhelming amount of power rise through him, his strength gaining to something that was beyond his previous power as he pulled his shoe back and kneeled down, gripping Izaya by the hair again and smirking at the finally frowning face of his enemy. Izaya had deep cuts and what seemed like a bright red burn along his right cheek where the road had torn at his skin, the same cheek already bruising from where Shizuo had accidentally missed with one of his punches. "Stop? But aren't we having so much fun?" he sneered, repeating something that the former male had said before to the latter. "I won't stop until you're dead and have suffered enough to make up for all of the pain you've caused tenfold."

Izaya growled, not enjoying his chances and definitely not liking being put down like this by someone who he usually had planned every move out for. He quickly flicked his arm down and allowed his knife to slide into his palm, slashing forward at Shizuo's neck in the same motion, a jab that was intendant to kill if Shizuo hadn't been prepared and caught the male's wrist, twisting it until it snapped and the black-haired man yelled out in pain, dropping the weapon. The blonde caught it, pushing Izaya up against the wall again and quickly slashing the blade into his chest, then his left cheek seeing as it was undamaged so far, then his right shoulder so that the dominant arm would hurt severely to move. He loved seeing those hateful chocolate eyes burning into him as if attempting to scald his very soul, he craved that raspy pant as Izaya attempted to channel away the pain without whimpering or showing signs that he was hurting horribly from the internal damage that had been caused by the punches, he was excited to receive more of the caught breath and the deep loathing from Izaya Orihara that was rarely shown through anything besides dark schemes. On a normal situation the information broker kept a calm face, acted polite, then went and screwed with Shizuo's life in a way that was like a jab in the heart, rarely allowing the latter to channel his hatred through physical pain, only running away from fights once he got the opportunity and keeping that smug smirk upon his cat-like face at all times. Now though the anger was obvious, his plan had failed and his calm wall had collapsed, his chest rising and falling painfully, blood running through and staining the dark grey v-neck shirt he wore. "So answer my question... Izaya-kun…" Shizuo wasn't normally a sadistic man, he didn't consider himself dark in any sense other than the violence that encased him and even that he regretted. But he couldn't stand this flea and somehow the satisfaction of finally winning took over, turning his emotions upside down. He loved the violence as it was helping him destroy the male who was glaring up at him. He loved the pain the jacketed man was in. He wanted more of it. "Does it hurt? Should I make it hurt more? I don't think you understand yet if you're still making that face at me." He then swiped Izaya's knife across his chest one more time to create something like an x-mark tear, making the shirt fall to shreds and the bleeding wounds' seeping visible. He caught the brunette flinch and grit his teeth to prevent a cry as the air stung at the tears in his skin. "Shizu-chan…"

"What? You hardly have the right to plead with me to stop, not after all of the times you've enjoyed watching others suffer. I think you should understand what you're laughing at. You do love humans, don't you? Why don't you see what one of your countless victims feels like?" He then did it again, slamming Izaya's head into the wall hard enough to slightly crack the weak, rotting material, a loud noise of pain finally reaching his awaiting ears. Shizuo punched at the male's chest and knocked the air out of him before curling his fingers around his neck and slamming him forward again. Izaya's hands lifted, his nails attempting to claw into Shizuo's wrists to threaten him to release but that pain was nothing compared to the pain he had previously sustained because of _this flea._ Izaya's hands were warmer than average human hands were supposed to be, indicating that he probably had a fever and was in more serious condition than he was letting on from the internal bleeding; he probably had a higher pain tolerance than Shizuo expected of him. No matter. He kept slamming, punching, taking the knife that he had retrieved from the info-broker and stabbed or slicing, his muscles releasing all of their energy into this one form as all of his rage built up and flowed out of him. It was the second time in his life he wasn't going to hold back, having no pity for this manipulative, uncaring bastard, ready to shred him limb by limb but only once he was sure that Izaya had endured all of the suffering that he could take. He dug the knife into Izaya's stomach and the male coughed, blood slipping from his lips down his chin and spraying out to scatter on Shizuo's already torn and stained vest, only provoking him to hit harder. By now Izaya's jacket had been shredded to the point where it had slipped off of his shoulders and was barely even held on him anymore, the bruises and blood staining the pale skin as if it were some kind of abstract painting. "S… stop…" He was quieter, his voice less heightened with the energy and mischievousness it usually had but replaced with something that sounded almost unlike him, quieter, almost as if he were tired. But even if he wanted to Shizuo couldn't stop now, his hands were moving on their own, over and over, his mind only partially focused on the figure before him and mostly concentrated on the memories, the countless memories, of this scummy dog ruining his and many other's lives over and over just for the hell of it. Each cry of pain was enough to drive him forward more, each cough and each yelp addicting to his vengeful ears.

"Shizu-chan…" Izaya finally muttered before his hands slipped from their places around Shizuo's wrist and his head fell forward, unable to be supported by his weakened neck anymore. Whether lack of air or too much pain or the internal damage had finally taken over, he had fallen unconscious. It took a few more hits for Shizuo to even realize this, his fist halting in midair as his eyes widened at the broken figure before him. Izaya's shirt and jacket were practically not there with how many tears were in them from the road burn, the dragging of the wall, and the knife slashing across them, his chest and arms covered with bright blue bruises, red marks that were sure to form into such, and bloody, messy splotches, his wrist and a few ribs appearing abnormally positioned as if they were broken and both dried and fresh blood leaving a dark trail down from his pale lip to his chin. What had he done..? Quickly stepping back and only half-carefully lowering Izaya to the ground Shizuo saw that there was also a hand-shaped mark around the former's neck. No matter what he'd done before, he'd never beat someone down this badly. He would've assumed that the informant were dead if his chest wasn't rising and falling heavily and unevenly, his mouth slightly cracked open to absorb air and a small cough running from his throat as a little of his blood ran down into it. It was true that Izaya deserved this, no, he deserved to die for what he did, but… this… Shizuo felt even further like a monster than he ever had. He had enjoyed this, doing this damage, no matter to whom it was dealt. Slowly picking up Izaya's head and allowing it to rest on his leg he sighed and brushed away some raven strands from the unconscious male's face, attempting and failing to get the blood out of his hair subconsciously as he tried to get ahold on the sudden exhaustion that always took over when he finished falling from his violent streaks. "I'm not going to lie, flea, you deserved every moment of this…" he muttered, speaking with a sigh as if he were scolding a young child. A new view on Izaya was coming into his head slowly and he didn't' want it there. Sure the guy was crazy, insane and sadistic, manipulative and uncaring to anyone's feelings at all, claiming to love humans as he tore their relations and literally sent some of them to the grave for the fun of it… but there was something about him that made it seem like he were just a child playing a game. Was there ever a reason behind his schemes? Shizuo didn't know and had no intention to find out. But whether there was or not… he didn't intend to apologize.

Suddenly he heard something familiar, a horse's neigh echoing out through the now orange-tinted skies, a sigh rerunning from his lips as he glanced over to see none other than Celty skidding to a halt at the end of the alley. If she had a face she would be revealing an expression of shock, he was sure, as she was practically frozen there for a moment, seeing Izaya resting in Shizuo's lap like that, completely ruined in appearance with all of the bruises and blood, slashes and breaks. Finally she slowly lifted herself from her bike, her fingers shakily but speedily skidding across the keyboard of her phone as she approached, holding out what she had typed to the blonde as he gave her something similar to an apologetic grin. 'You went too far.' It simply stated. "I was planning to kill him, I think this is just enough," Shizuo replied carelessly, laying back and attempting to ignore the small groan of irritation that Izaya breathed out at the movement. Celty began typing again. 'We need to take him to Shinra or he might really die.' She was obviously referencing the blood that had no doubt come from his lungs that had been coughed up and the countless evidence of horribly strong punches to the male's gut. Shizuo sighed once more, nodding in weak agreement as he rose to his feet and lifted Izaya into his arms. He'd never thought he'd actually have the stability to touch the bastard, let alone help carry him to safety, but now here he was. It wasn't as bad as he had thought. Maybe it was because he had released all of his anger into those attacks and had no more regret towards the male. Maybe he was overthinking it. It didn't matter. 'Are you coming?' Celty typed and he grunted a 'yeah,' not taking his eyes off of the strained expression on Izaya's paled, damaged face. It made him almost feel bad for the brunette knowing that honestly no one really cared if he lived or died. Everyone hated him and the people that would help him, Celty and Shinra, Shizuo himself… they were only doing it out of the goodness of their hearts. He wondered if Izaya ever considered that, if he did what Shizuo did multiple times and delt pain to recover and distract himself from his own. "You're still an idiot…" he growled quietly before beginning to walk towards Shinra's, not being too far away and not being able to put the both of them on Celty's bike. She began typing once more, seeing this. 'Do you want me to take him there for you?' She obviously considered not just that Izaya needed treatment immediately but that Shizuo probably couldn't stand the guy and if he just so happened to wake up and make a sarcastic comment he really might just die. But the blonde shook his head. "I've got it. No worries. Tell Shinra we're on our way." As Celty shrugged and drove off past him he glanced down for the last time. "I finally win… You know, I thought it'd feel a little less guilty than this. Once you can stand again leave this town and never come back." Despite talking to a form that couldn't hear a word he was saying he got the feeling that Izaya was listening somehow, the peaceful yet pained expression he held possibly being another one of his deceiving fronts. "But until then… just don't die, got it?"


	2. Fixing Up

**I was surprised to see a review for this story already, I didn't expect it to be noticed at least for a long while. It made me happy to see, thank you reviewer ^^ I'm not really sure where to take this story from here, if you have any suggestions at all please leave them in the reviews. I'll continue it though, I like writing and I really like looking into Shizuo and Izaya's personalities and thoughts, even if I might not be the best at it. Again, thank you for reading, have a nice night. ^^**

**PS: I don't know barely anything about medical things. Sorry if something I say isn't correct. **

It didn't take too long to arrive at the tall, grey, undistinguished building that Shinra and Celty called home, a place Shizuo had visited enough times through his high school years to the present to recognize by heart despite how similar it appeared compared to nearly every other building surrounding it. By now his starch white sleeves had been long stained with a red that seeped through the fabric and was beginning to dry uncomfortably onto his skin, making the clothing stick to his arms and chest, staining the precious bartender's uniform he received from his younger brother. Of course the red substance that would ruin one of his few prized possessions would be the flea's, Shizuo thought in irritation, but those aggravated jabs never once left his mouth. There were a few close calls where he wanted so badly to growl to Izaya just how pissed off he was at him but then he'd look down and see eyes that were squeezed shut in half-conscious pain, lips that were slightly parted as his chest heaved unorderly for air, and a paler-than-normal fist gripping tightly to Shizuo's dark vest to keep a tight hold, as if the flea were worried that at some point his enemy would just drop him to the ground. Izaya appeared to be awake enough to feel the pain, groaning every time the blonde's heavy-soled shoes pounded against the ground too forcefully, but didn't seem to be any more conscious than that. Shizuo knew Izaya well enough to be certain that the cocky bastard wouldn't show signs of being injured and would refuse help from the same man who half lived to attempt to crush and kill him under large flying objects. Honestly the brunette would probably refuse help from anyone. Shizuo had hit his target multiple times without givng the receiving male enough time to brace himself, various things weighing tons slamming into him, and he'd just stand right back up. He and Shizuo had one thing in common, despite him nearly gagging at the thought of being anything like the flea; They both couldn't stand to be pitied.

So now, seeing Izaya nearly clawing tears into his shirt, making small grunts and coughs of irritation at each sudden movement, Shizuo had to admit… he was worried. Someone who didn't show pain was now here suffering and practically bleeding out… he _had_ taken it too far. Celty was right, but Shizuo hadn't noticed until now where each second passing was another second where he wondered if another rigid breath would even come out of the pale form in his arms. He winced as Izaya shuddered after the blonde had begun to dart up the stairs, assuming that they were easily faster than the elevator, and he quickly took the steps back and growled in impatient nervousness as he slammed his fist so hard into the elevator's button that he was surprised it didn't shatter like most things did when he was pissed like this. Why was he worried about this idiot? Just yesterday he would've given any sum of money to see Izaya cowering and whining at pain he had inflicted, so why did he feel so damn _guilty? _No, he responded to himself, 'I don't care. I'm only helping him because Celty wanted it.' But still, the small voice in the back of his mind that strangely resembled an annoying little insect whispered back playfully, 'Whatever.'

Finally the damned elevator doors opened and Shizuo shoved into the small space, thanking the good Lord that no one was inside to see such a spectacle. The infamous Shizuo Heiwajima, the beast as he was usually titled, saving none other than his direct enemy and the sneaky know-it-all Izaya Orihara. It nearly made him sick to think of what the others would see this as.

And why was it going so damned slow?! He swore he would crush the door of the stupid box if it weren't for his arms being full and the startling quick reminder in his head that if he ended up breaking the elevator Izaya probably would die before any repairman could pull them out. That thought and that thought alone kept him still and nearly twitching with fury that couldn't currently be released. Once those doors opened he'd shove the flea into Shinra's care and run off to puke at his good deed and to smash a few heads of any idiot who attempted to fight him out of arrogance, something that happened far more often than he'd be happy to admit. Izaya would wake up and Shizuo would threaten with force that neither the scientist nor the headless biker say a word of what happened. They'd tell him something like he was jumped by the yellow scarves, something that would make the bastard take a few steps down from his high horse and would leave Shizuo completely, one hundred percent out of this.

A small, far too cheery 'ding' rang out to indicate that finally the doors were sliding open. If he had taken the stairs they would've easily been in and out by now but no, of course that wouldn't have worked. The blonde was steaming as he reached out a spare arm (the flea was unusually light, did he even eat?) and pried the doors open due to them opening far too slowly for his impatient tastes. Whoever had designed those things definitely wasn't going for efficiency in the speed department. Shizuo found that the door was already unlocked, Celty no doubt having arrived already and informing Shinra of what she had caught sight off on one of her rides. Hopefully the doctor hadn't gotten caught up in his words and forgotten to prepare to start any treatment necessary.

Shizuo threw the door open, rushing in and, to his slight (SLIGHT) relief, nearly stepping on a large, plastic, bleach white blanket spread out on the floor. The furniture that was usually neatly centered in the possible couple's small apartment living room was shoved aside, a chair tipped to rest on its back, the table leaving drag marks from where it had been shoved to the corner to make room. Shinra was standing beside the kitchen counter, shuffling hastily through a suspiciously large medical bag, as Celty quickly made her way from a back room to the two blood-soaked figures who had practically barged through her front door. Without having time to type what was being processed in her non-existent brain she hurridly pointed to Izaya then to the plastic mat. Shizuo nodded in understanding and kneeled down, sighing one last time as he nearly had to pry the flea's hand off of his vest to release him. If only he had the same manipulative, immature mind as Izaya did; he would be teasing the raven-haired male over this for years.

"I've got everything I think we need!" Shinra declared in some form of victorious tone before skidding to the ground and nearly shoving Shizuo aside in his haste. A low growl in the back of 'the beast''s throat was enough to snap him out of his doctor state enough to remember who exactly he was trying to shove away, and Shinra apologized quietly. Celty was also there, kneeling as they all took on the same expressions, both obviously noticing the same thing that Shizuo had noticed; Izaya doesn't show pain. He would have to be in agony to be flinching at every movement like this, his fists squeezed so tightly around the empty air now that the blonde's vest wasn't within reach that his knuckles were even whiter than they already were, his entire body paler than average from obvious bloodloss. Shinra rushed to do an inspection, feeling the flea's forehead before anything. "He's burning up, looks like his body might be in a panic," the doctor muttered more to himself than to either of the two observers. "Celty, help me pull off his shirt, will you dear?" If she had a face she would've no doubt shot him a glare for the swoozy name-calling but there was no time for that and she quickly leaned over the mat, Shizuo sitting back and watching silently as they worked off the shreds of the ruined jacket that Izaya always wore outside of his home. A voice in the back of the blonde's heavily working mind whispered, 'He ruined your treasured outfit, you ruined his. Even?' Whatever this conscious thing was that was beginning to more frequently appear, he didn't like it. 'Shut up,' he growled in return, thankfully not speaking the words out loud. It was enough for his friends to finally probably see him as a monster, adding 'crazy' to the list wouldn't help his case. There was no doubt he was in for a scolding for beating Izaya down this badly, though they all should've expected it.

Next came his shirt. It was awkward in a way, stripping someone who wasn't conscious enough to deny it, though there wasn't much choice in the matter by this point. Shizuo winced, wishing he had been able to arrive earlier. By now enough time had passed for the bruises to fully form, the cuts to drain into dry, crusted blood that tinted the skin on his chest a dirty crimson, and for the obvious break in either one or a few of the flea's ribs to stick out awkwardly from the rest of his heaving chest. "His ribs are obviously snapped in a few places… the incisions may grow infected if we don't clean them quickly and he'll have to deal with the bruises and possible scarring for a while after. Just how angry were you anyways?" Shinra's self-talk slipped into a question stabbing towards Shizuo but the stronger of the two wasn't in any mood to hold a conversation. "Just fix him already." Honestly the blonde didn't even know why he was still sitting here. Wasn't he going to leave? Dart out of the room and force the two to recite some stupid, humiliating story to explain why he was so ruined all of the sudden? But no, some un-named force held him down, focused his eyes on each wound, and sent a nice jabbing feeling into his chest every time a small tone in his voice would say something like 'That'll probably scar,' 'You really went all out, didn't you?' 'You know he probably remembers what happened without the fake story.' Even his mind was against him now. Celty obviously caught Shizuo zoning out because she pulled out her phone and allowed her fingers to dart over the keys, crawling to her feet and placing herself back to the floor, this time beside her friend, and showing him what she had typed. 'He'll be alright. He'll probably just laugh it off.' That was true… "Thanks," Shizuo grunted quietly. Celty had a way of making people relax slightly, maybe that was why she was possibly the only one Shizuo could go to when he was near the breaking point of his anger and find relief in.

"Uh oh."  
"Uh oh _what?"_ Hearing those words from a doctor meant bad things. Very, very bad things. Shinra pulled back something that seemed to be a stethoscope if Shizuo had any remaining knowledge of medical supplies from high school, a dreading look in his eye. He was at a disadvantage, being in a room with two people who would probably strangle him if he came out with bad news. "Well, uh… his head. That's what. I'd be sort of surprised if there wasn't some damage to it, is what I'm saying. Whatever you hit it with ('the concrete', Shizuo nearly muttered) was hard enough to fracture his forehead just slightly."  
"Good, maybe he'll get a little dumber, he needs it." He knew that wasn't the correct answer to something as grim as what the doctor was saying but he was in a rotten mood and if Celty and Shinra wouldn't let him toss some of their furniture out the window (they wouldn't) then he'd have to spit his anger out with his words. 'We can't joke around right now,' Celty typed as Shinra irritably went back to his inspection but Shizuo only sighed, rubbing his eye slightly. It was just like the flea to get them all this worked up. "He had a hard head, I've hit him with vending machines and trash cans, all sorts of things, and he's been just fine. Maybe it would be for the greater good anyways for him to wake up without his memories or something," the nicely-dressed male replied halfheartedly despite feeling a little disappointed with his own words. Izaya without memories… Would the flea finally go away for good? He admitted and quickly took it back after doing so, it was pretty entertaining to be able to consistently attack someone without them ever getting too seriously injured. Izaya was the only one (other than Simon, but he was a pacifist) who was able to take a few hits without issue. Another reason to add to the forcefully created list of why he shouldn't feel so pissed off for saving the bastard.

"Alright, so in total I've summed up that… He has a lot of bruises that he'll have to let heal and he'll be pretty sore and exhausted for a while, he has road burn on his left cheek that'll probably need to heal, his cuts will need to be disinfected, he'll have a horrible headache at the end of this…"

'So you think he'll live?' Celty typed, shoving her phone into Shinra's face to snap him from his slowly descending focus. "Yes, though what we need to focus on now are the broken bones and the damage to his head. It also seems extremely likely that he has internal damage from the way he's struggling to breathe and looking into exactly how hard Shizuo can hit. But once we fix the main issues he'll just need patience and time to recover, he'll be alright." Celty's body moved as if she were sighing in relief despite there being no sound or expression to prove it. Despite his silence Shizuo felt a rush of relief like a river flowing through him and relieving just a tiny bit of the fury that was eating him away from the inside. It was so freaking difficult to stay calm like this. Thankfully Shinra seemed to notice. "Shizuo, why don't you go change? I have some of your old clothes from senior year still in my closet, we haven't changed much so they should still fit. Take a shower maybe."  
"Right," the blonde responded, not feeling like arguing and trudging off. When he reached the door to Shinra's bedroom he looked back, only able to see black strands contrasting greatly with the blindingly white sheet, an arm that was almost always covered by a sleeve of some sort, now covered with bruises and slashes, and a slight movement as Izaya's fingers tightened further into a deadly grip at his palm.

An hour passed, then another. By now Shizuo had already showered, changed into a white button down and pants resembling the black ones he normally wore, leaving his vest hanging on the shower door so that he could wash off the blood later. The shower had been sickening; he hadn't realized just how covered in the stuff he had been until he saw it staining the running water a horribly bright red, flaking off his skin as he had to scrub and scrub endlessly to peel off the layer that had dried on. He was used to seeing blood, but rarely did it ever get on him, and never in this quantity. What was even more discomforting was knowing that it wasn't his own, but Izaya's blood, that was swirling down the drain. Izaya's blood that wasn't in his body because of Shizuo himself. Again, a wave of guilt washed over him. Why did he care? But he did. He had calmed down enough to allow himself to answer the question truthfully. He cared, he cared greatly, not specifically for Izaya but for the life of someone he had known for years. To know that he nearly ended a life, and a quite positive one at that judging by the playful and cheerful tone Izaya always took to his schemes, would only continue to bother him for the rest of his life. There was a difference between people he knew and random mobsters that tried to idiotically jump him on one of his mindless walks to the park. He knew Izaya's voice, what the male liked, what he disliked. He knew certain things that had happened in his life though vaguely (and probably falsely since the raven-haired man rarely gave out information about himself that was true) and he knew his family, his two younger sisters that pleaded and even offered Izaya's life to meet Shizuo's famous brother. He knew Izaya, less by conversation and more by the way they fought repeatedly. He was fast, cunning, horribly smart and sneaky, not minding playing tricks as Shizuo had learned at their first fight where the flea had sneaked up behind him, tapped him on the shoulder, then slashed him directly through the chest when he turned around to punch again. He was smart and efficient, proven by how he could do serious damage to anyone with something as tiny as a switchblade no matter how many he was up against and even pitting a decent fight against the beast of Ikebukuro himself for such a long time. And no matter how greatly Shizuo loathed the bastard… he didn't want to lose someone that he knew so well. Someone that he understood but refused to accept the opinions of and someone who thought the very same of him. He hated Izaya but there was truth to the fact that no one else would accept a fight with him out of a reason so insane as to 'play around.' His eyes glanced to the clock. Ten-thirty PM. It was late but it hardly mattered, neither him nor the flea had anyone to really return home to and in all honesty the blonde didn't want to leave until he knew for certain how the injured male was holding up. Right as that thought entered his head Celty pushed the door open, her black-gloved hand holding out a bright screen that nearly made Shizuo squint, as he had been sitting in the darkness of the spare room for too long and had grown accustomed to it. 'Shinra's done. Do you want to come out?' With a small, silent nod, the man rose and took a deep breath, preparing himself to leave the room again.

When he entered the bright living room he glanced down to see Shinra with bloody gloved hands and blood-tipped tools of all sorts lining the bloody plastic mat. Honestly it was a little sickening and surprising how much blood one could let out before it affected them too badly. Izaya was breathing quickly as if he were panting slightly but his eyes had relaxed, a soft expression possessing his face, one Shizuo had never seen before. Honestly he didn't look so horribly and aggravatingly malicious when he was sleeping like this. His body had relaxed but there were a few additions. While the smaller cuts remained, Shinra had stitched up the larger ones and a deep incision had been more recently made, probably a slash the doctor had to make himself to open up the flea's chest and work on fixing and examining the major internal damage. The thought of it nearly made Shizuo feel nauseous and he was glad he had left the room after all. Walking out to see organs and gore all over the place wouldn't have welcomed his already worked-up mind all too well.

All that appeared to be left was bandages, a roll of white, tape-like medical cloth being unraveled in Shinra's hand as he cut off of a long piece of it and lifted Izaya's head, beginning to wrap it around and under the strands of slightly messy hair that fell in the way. "It seems like he'll be fine, amazingly. The damage to his head wasn't as great as I figured. I guess you were right, Shizuo," Shinra smiled relaxingly towards the incomer. Shizuo nodded, falling back on one of the chairs that hadn't been shoved off it's legs to make room for the plastic sheet, feeling exhausted all of the sudden, probably still from the amount of force he exerted beating the crap out of his technical enemy. Shinra finished wrapping his head and moved down to begin curling the bandages around Izaya's chest. The male had probably recovered some of his blood as his skin was fading back into shade again and was retaining its color once more. He still remained peacefully unconscious. "He passed out around halfway through… I didn't want to give him any anesthesia without knowing how he'd react to it so…"  
"So you cut him open while he was awake?" Shinra flinched at the guilt-inflicting tone that Shizuo took on, turning back to deny with a debating preparedness, "It's not like you're any different."

Then Celty, who had been absent from the room for a while, came in holding something that made both of the boys freeze for a second. Shinra was the first to recover, jumping to his feet after finishing wrapping Izaya's chest to hold his weakly repaired ribs in place. "Oh, Celty! I didn't know you were in to that sort of thing! I know this is a bad time but tonight for sure we'll reenact all of your wildest dreams and..~!" He was silenced by a loud 'smack' as the headless rider smashed her phone into his forehead, four words written in bold font on the screen: 'Shut up, you idiot.' Despite the rude reply Shinra rubbed his head and lowered himself down with no grudge held once-so-ever, continuing to finish the final touches on Izaya's treatment as Celty then made her way to Shizuo, typing hastily and showing him her words once she arrived to the chair he was reclining in. 'Knowing him he'll try to run off in the middle of the night. If someone happened to attack him while he's in this state there's a high chance he'll be hurt further. I figured we should probably use these to keep him from leaving before he's healed enough.'  
"Makes sense," Shizuo replied, admitting that he was slightly amused and curious to see how the flea would react to waking up handcuffed to the bed. "If Shinra's done then I'll help carry him to the spare room."  
'Do you want to sleep here as well? It's gotten late.' Normally Shizuo would deny such an offer, the blonde rarely enjoying taking advantage of other's hospitality, unlike a certain _someone _ in most cases where he had the choice. Besides, he was generally an introvert and preferred time alone to be greater in quantity than time spent with others. But then again, if something did happen overnight it would be his fault for inflicting those wounds in the first place, and he didn't want to stand for any more guilt, so he nodded with a partial sigh. "Sure. Thanks."


	3. Good Morning Indeed

It hadn't taken too long to prepare for bed. Shinra quickly and easily wrapped up Izaya's probably broken wrist tightly in its own bandage and he and Celty began washing the blood off the flea's chest, arms, and face with a damp rag, the pair simultaneously announcing that Shizuo should go set up the guest room if he wanted to help. The blonde was pretty sure that they still didn't trust him near the raven-haired male. He wasn't insane, as long as the flea was out cold for sure and not scheming something against him he could hold in his mild anger. The only reason he got angry on the normal basis was seeing him in Ikebukuro in the first place. That had faded long before this point.

Within the next thirty minutes a bed was prepared, the unconscious form of his postponed enemy lowered onto the blankets, and his non-injured wrist clipped snuggly through the ring of the handcuffs, the other side attached to the bedframe so that even if Izaya did wake up he wouldn't dart out the window. It was understandable that he didn't like accepting help from others, enjoying being the one holding the strings and disliking not having control over his situation (like this) but it was for his own sake that he wasn't allowed to take off before he was healed well enough to walk a mile or two without collapsing. He was in bad condition and if Shizuo absolutely _had_ to make up for anything to stifle the guilt that was pacing through him reasonlessly then he'd do it through keeping the bastard alive for a little longer. The second Izaya was laid on the pillow he seemed to relax, his stiffened form softening and his head slightly turning to welcome the comfort of the soft bedding without hesitation. It was strange that Shizuo was watching him sleep like this, on the line of downright weird, but he couldn't take his eyes away, being too entranced by his own mind and zoning out again every time he attempted to bring himself back to focus. Izaya was so peaceful when he slept… He didn't smile and yet he didn't appear angry, just blank, calm, two things he rarely ever was when awake and active. The bandages still left an effect to his image but despite the bluish bruised portion of his skin beneath his eye and the slash on his cheek he seemed almost normal, which was relieving in its own way. He looked young, innocent like a child despite all of the mature and dark plots racing through his mind at nearly every second… 'Damn it', Shizuo thought, 'What am I thinking? He's twisted and the second he's healed enough I'll kick him out of the city for good. This time at least he'll know I'm not just threatening for the hell of it.' But despite the rough attitude he hardly felt the part. "Good night, flea," he sighed, finally gaining control of his wondering brain and switching off the lights on the switch positioned parallel to the cracked white door. Celty and Shinra, who were both murmuring and typing fiercely as if they were both caught up in some form of debate, paused and silenced as Shizuo re-entered the room. 'How is he doing?' Celty typed, the blonde shrugged carelessly as he came close enough to read the words off of the screen. "Fine. Too fine maybe, but." Despite the threat ever so gently inched into his words, Shinra smiled softly at Shizuo's remark. "He should wake up around noon tomorrow, he's probably too exhausted to get up any time tonight or in the morning." 'Great', Shizuo thought,'That works perfectly, I won't be here.' However he didn't mention the words he'd normally say without a second thought out loud. Shinra and Celty were two of the people he could count on one hand that didn't fear him and he didn't want to put himself in a situation to try and sound like a jerk, especially not after what he did. But still, they should've expected it. It was only a matter of time before the flea would get what he deserved.

"Let's all get some sleep as well, it's been a stressful day," Shinra commented with a goofy grin, one that only he could really pull off and look halfway sane, and Shizuo nodded in his agreement. He was dead tired and the miniature nap on the cushioned chair in the living room hadn't helped all that much. With a few more works (and keys) they finally all split, Shinra and Celty departing to their designated rooms and the blonde plopping back on the black couch. He knew he was tired but didn't know just how tired, Shizuo managing to fall asleep before he even had the chance to take off his purple-stained glasses.

The next morning his eyes fluttered open to the sound of shuffling. However this noise wasn't Celty creating some miserable-tasting dish or Shinra hustling around the apartment running his mouth. Of course, it just had to be coming from the closed door that the flea was still supposed to be passed out behind. Didn't Shinra say he wouldn't even be able to open his eyes until morning? But of course the black-haired idiot would _have_ to go against what everyone expected of him. It was just his thing by this point.

Standing without giving himself a chance to fully recover from his night's rest he stormed to the door and flung it open, hardly caring that it nearly slammed into the wall hard enough to leave a dent. And there he was. Izaya, who's eyes were clearly open and narrowed with focus and what appeared to be a pained wince, attempting to use the belt he had somehow managed to sling from his waist to pick at the lock holding him in place. He probably would've already been successful if it weren't for his free wrist being snapped, though, of course, he was attempting to use the injured hand to aid him in digging the belt's clip into the lock anyways. At the noise of the door being forced open so fiercely he glanced up, his face still mauled slightly with the bright red scrapes on one side and the bruise and cut on the other, recognition flickering in his eyes, which illuminated crimson in the dawning sunlight, before of all things he grinned like a child caught doing something bad. "Good morning, Shizu-chan," he chimed as if the man he was addressing hadn't been the same one that pounded him into the ground just the day before. "What are you doing awake, flea?" Shizuo growled, his eye twitching slightly at the corny nickname but his brain reminding him that he had attempted to correct it too many times without success. Izaya took on a confused look, tilting his head slightly with a small 'hm?' to aid in his innocent expression. "Am I not allowed to wake up, Shizu-chan? I mean, even I thought you'd killed me for a while but that's sort of cruel," he mused, blinking softly despite the obvious sting that shot through him every time the bruised eye closed and reopened. "Whatever! And don't do that! You're not getting out of here until I say so," the blonde replied in agitation, reaching forward to grip the belt's tail that was laying over Izaya's waist, free from defense. The latter male quickly tried to tug back but with his wrist snapped he barely stood a chance, not standing a chance anyways with Shizuo's mega strength. Easily pulling the belt from smaller hands he had finally succeeded in wiping that playful and uncoincidentally mischievous smirk off of the informant's cocky face. "You're being awfully nice today," Izaya grumbled, leaning back to rest his sore neck against the soft, warmed pillows, pouting slightly in irritation as his plan was literally swept from his grasps. "If you want to finish the job now's a good time, Shizu-chan, I obviously can't run from you anymore." If he didn't know better Shizuo would've thought that Izaya sounded almost… bitter. It was a rare tone for him, even the flea got down sometimes but he never seemed so negative about a situation. Did he really feel that horrible physically? "You're lucky Celty arrived in time to keep me from snapping your puny neck, be grateful that I'm not doing it now," he replied, growing further and further irritated with the conversation; Izaya's voice alone was enough to leech the calm right out of him. There was silence for a moment, an awkward pause as the two seemed to simultaneously glance out the window that had been drawn open the night before to grant Izaya some fresh air as he slept, the sunrise still just barely painting the baby blue skies in pastel colors that peeked through the cracks between the tall, overwhelming city buildings, a few clouds smeared through the air by a finger who was too careless to correct the blurry purplish forms. It was a nice morning, a faint wind rustling the plain white curtains but not one so powerful as to be uncomfortable or chilling. For the first time since the morning prior Shizuo felt calmed again, this surprising even himself since he was standing within six feet of the flea without any current urge to pounce the man and strangle him again. At the thought he glanced down, grateful that Izaya was still lost in his own thoughts and didn't notice the blonde staring at a large, easily noticeable bruise around his neck, a bruise shaped like two hands and eight fingers curling around the circumference. Yet again a twang of guilt tugged at him and he forced himself to look away again, grateful slightly that he did get that feeling since the moment his head turned the flea snapped out of his daydreams and glanced up at Shizuo with a faint but slightly less irritatingly cocky smile traced upon his lips. "So what all happened? You must've gotten me pretty hard if I can't recall anything past a few cuts and punches." It was weird, Izaya acting so calm as if he either didn't care or completely forgave the blonde despite the circumstances. Shizuo almost wished that Izaya did awaken angry and yelling. It would've been easier to not want to feel bad for him if he did, but, again, the bastard always was unpredictable and rarely did what he was expected or hoped to do. Shizuo sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose slightly and adjusting his glasses. Here he went, actually telling the truth rather than making up some dumb story for who knew why. "That was about it. You sort of passed out for a minute and then Celty showed up."  
"Ah, alright. You won't catch me again, though. May I have my knife back?"  
"You'll just use it to cut your way out."  
"Aw, Shizu-chan! Don't you trust me?"  
"I never have and swear I never will." Despite the content of the small talk, it was almost relieving to be holding a conversation with someone he knew (NOT specifically Izaya). Seeing the male who was literally dying in his arms the night before awake and smiling and chattering nonstop like he always did sent a bit of comfort to the one who had nearly killed him in the first place. Shizuo realized right away and chose to leave out the part of the story right before Celty had rode up on her motorbike though, the part where he stopped hitting at Izaya and let the smaller form rest on his lap. He knew the flea was nothing short of amusement if he was feeling this much better already and he hardly wanted another reason to be teased added onto the long and steadily increasing list.

But it all seemed small… like a game, that was it. It was as if Izaya had simply lost a game he had gotten good at, was grinning his way through the short spurt of embarrassment, and was discussing politely with his successor. Shizuo never considered it a game, more as a direct habit of chasing the raven-haired male down at every chance to force him to stop interfering with the lives of the Ikebukuro citizens, but the fights were a way he despairingly admitted relieved a little pent up anger.

Sighing once more Shizuo turned to the door, sparking another confused glance from the only other person in the room who automatically began to kick the blankets off as if he was ready to jump up and leave as well, only to be impaired by both the pain that probably shot through his legs at the quick, jerking motions and the handcuffs pulling at his wrist alike. "Where are you going, Shizu-chan?"  
"I need a smoke. Stay here," he commanded despite the flea hardly having any other choice, hearing a groan of disagreement from behind him but shutting the door anyways.

He hurt. He hurt a lot. But what was far more irritating than the pain was the fact that he couldn't stand, couldn't run, couldn't get free. There were no tools that he could use to his advantage, his silver rings not effective in picking locks and his belt stolen away from Shizu-chan. Shinra and Celty had obviously already planned for him to possibly awaken before they expected and had cleared the bedside table of anything other than a spare pillow that rested awkwardly atop the too-small wooden base. The headboard, which was made of steel, was firm and not going anywhere nor breaking off anytime soon… and that covered everything that he could reach that might be of some help to him. When he tried to extend his grip he was only met with a sharp stabbing feeling through his uncuffed wrist, his bright, blood-red eyes flickering down to see a tight bandage wrapped around it, just tight enough to bound it securely without cutting the circulation. Shinra had always been a good binder with medical tape, he thought with a careless sigh as he allowed his head to fall back on his pillow once more. He was bored, horribly bored, and he had only woken up a few minutes prior to Shizuo ever so rudely barging in. Who knew how long they'd keep him in here? All Izaya knew was that his chest hurt every time it rose and fell with his breath, his head was throbbing with a pounding migraine, and each movement on his part sent another wave of pain darting through his nerves with every bruise and cut that was strung up him. He had realized he was shirtless the moment he had woken up, noticing many wounds that he didn't remember being inflicted, but that was probably because he had passed out. One cut stood out above the rest, one that was deeper and stitched up with tiny crossed patterns down the center of his chest in a perfectly even, thick, red and slight puffy line. Shinra had probably had to do some surgery then, Izaya realized with a wince at the thought. Hopefully the inventive doctor hadn't pitted him up for some test experiments while he had been unconscious. This was what got to him the most, the fact that he had no control over what had happened in the past while, no control once so ever over the span of twelve whole lengthy hours. Even his cellphone was gone, probably still in the pocket of the jacket that he quite liked that was probably shredded up by now due to Shizu-chan's brute force. How irritating… and even now, he was trapped. He hated it. But he'd get out eventually… They couldn't just keep him pinned down forever, right? They'd have to let him stretch his legs or use the restroom or shower at some point, and when they did he'd make his escape, maybe nicking a little revenge against the blonde powerhouse in the process. But until then…. Izaya laughed slightly, chuckling quietly to himself despite the entire lack of a smile on his bitter expression. Crimson eyes focused on the plain white ceiling; it felt like he was in confinement. He was surprised it took so long for him to be locked up in a blank white room, but this wasn't quite what he was expecting. They must've forgotten the straightjacket. But still, he wasn't tired enough to fall asleep again and felt too crappy to attempt to raise his voice or struggle any further than the pools of energy that it took to create meager movement that had already been exerted. "Great job, Shizu-chan," he sighed, muttering softly as his voice refused to raise any higher than it was currently speaking. "This is pure torture."


	4. On a Tight Leash

**Okay, for starters this chapter is either going to be horribly long or it's going to be split up into two chapters. I typed out a review brainstorm thingy for this chapter so that I could organize my ideas (I usually don't but I've been tired today so I felt it might be necessary ;-;) and just that, without details or anything, took up around three pages.  
But into the more important things. Your reviews have literally made my entire week go from sort of downish to practically flying. It makes me so happy that yall enjoy the story! That was my hope when I began writing it and it really, really excites me to know that people enjoy reading it. I can't thank you enough.  
IkaruSakurai: Thank you so much for the idea! I was considering something like that but it makes me feel reassured to know that you agree. ^^ It also made me extremely happy about your comment on me keeping Shizuo and Izaya in character. That was one of my greatest worries when starting this story, since Izaya and Shizuo's characters are both generally complex and it's easy to make them too silly or dark or anything else. So thank you!  
Kirisaki-ouji: Haha, it makes sense that you'd be overwhelmed, it is quite a lot to take in with the billion paragraphs. I do sort of seem to rant don't I? :P Thank you so so much for your review though! Like I said to IkaruSakurai, it worried me greatly and even postponed me from writing this for a while because I was worried that I wouldn't be able to keep the characters acting the way they're supposed to, so it makes me extremely happy to hear that I'm doing it right!  
You reviewers are the complete motivation of this story, so, again, I can't thank you enough! I think I've said that enough to show my point though, haha. Anyways, this author's note alone probably took up like half a page in Word and this chapter is already probably going to be extremely, extremely long, so I'll get to it. Hope you enjoy this, thank you again (and again and again :P) for reading, and have a great night! **

**PS: I will go back and check for misspellings and grammatical errors but it's pretty late so I might miss a few. Apologies for that. **

He didn't know why he was still here. Well, he did somewhat know. Tom, his friend and colleague that he collected taxes with, heard from quiet word the situation that had happened in the alley, having asked around after he walked out of the building he was collecting in to notice that Shizuo was nowhere in sight, easily recognizing the debris of crushed metallic objects and following the obvious scrap trail to a dark alley that had relatively fresh blood painting soft, crimson dashes along the chipped concrete on the road and a clear smash in the previously bumpily smooth brick wall. After discovering that the mess was the remains of Shizuo's first win against the informant he called up the bodyguard and commanded that he take some time off to think his actions through clearly, obviously feeling the same way towards Shizuo as everyone else seemed to; If they didn't think he was a monster before, they did now.

But with the few days he was given to 'cool his head' he could be anywhere but here. He could be watching children play in the park, knocking around a few rogue yellow scarves, or eating at Simon's restaurant like the Russian chef always begged when he passed, but no. Instead his legs had refused fiercely to move, his mind agreeing to remain, and instead of anywhere else even mildly more entertaining he was leaning forward against the railing of the small balcony attached to Shinra and Celty's apartment's living room. It had been two full days, forty-eight hours plus some, since he had dragged Izaya to this very room half alive and hardly breathing. Time had dragged on with Celty consistently running out to fetch errands, answer calls, or do either of the two as an excuse to actually search for her missing head. When she wasn't riding around on her noiseless motorbike she'd be leaned lazily before a computer screen, typing rapidly through a chat box to strangers who hardly knew her as a person, let alone that she was a headless, speechless fantasy. Shinra was generally gone as well, his job as an undercover doctor taking off far more than Shizuo had ever expected it to have. It was more common than not to be alone during the days, or at least as alone as he'd get. While there _was_ another person in the other room Shizuo wouldn't do anything to walk in there voluntarily and start having a conversation with the irritating flea. He still couldn't stand him, despite being able to sit still at the thought of him due to the subtle threats from the homeowners to not harm the injured. Izaya had easily been taking advantage of this opportunity, often teasing at Shizuo and chuckling at the expression the blonde would make as his body demanded him to slam his fist forward and punch the sound right out of the raven-haired male and everything else restricting him from it entirely. To keep from finally losing control over his temper Shizuo easily and effortlessly chose to just avoid the flea as often as possible. It wasn't that hard with the other male literally locked in one place.

But despite the empty lack of entertainment Shizuo couldn't find the energy to lift himself to his feet and actually go somewhere, even if he never really did have a destination planned. He wasn't tired, however his mind had absorbed him in, surrounding him by a layer of foggy daydreams and dozes. He always was a little out of it, earning him the forbidden name "protozoan" by 'The Great Orihara,' but never to this extent. Maybe he was getting sick or something.

Thankfully at this current moment he actually wasn't alone. Shinra had returned from fixing some gangster's broken ribs, preparing himself lunch without any issue despite the gory sights he had probably seen not too long before. It was almost amazing how little Shinra cared about blood flesh wounds. He'd willingly stick his finger into a hole in someone's leg just to see what it would feel like. Amazing and somewhat freaky. Shizuo hardly cared. All that really mattered at this current moment were the splattered grey clouds he was gazing into so effortlessly and the relieving breath of nicotine that was inhaled and exhaled via the fresh cigarette positioned evenly between his fore and middle finger. Despite the dull atmosphere it was once again quiet, the flea being a major irritation every time Celty made Shizuo bring him food (and she always did for some reason. Couldn't she do it herself?). But Izaya ate fast, almost as if he were starved on most occasions, and Shizuo only generally had to spend five minutes a day around him in total.

"Shizuo! Do you want something to eat too?" His gaze drifted downwards from the slowly propelling clouds to the dust flickering off of his cigarette's tip into the open air as his attention was grabbed by Shinra's voice behind him, calling through the opened glass door that usually separated the balcony from the living room. Celty had insisted on leaving it open, the sun making its only full appearance from its hiding in the heat of the day and even Shizuo had to admit it got pretty hot inside without the gentle breezes to send a cooling relief sliding along his skin. Besides, the fresh air felt nicer than the warm and slight claustrophobic oxygen that hovered drudgingly over the apartment's indoors, and this way he and Shinra could have a mild conversation without him having to toss his cigarette out. "I'm fine. Not hungry," he replied, shrugging slightly in indifference. Shizuo had realized he was rather indifferent to a lot of things. He contradicted himself. He realized he wasn't concerned with a lot of things that he probably should at least mildly care about, like having the first two people that come to mind when thinking of who he trusted to be a practical mad scientist and a headless horseman, or a demon blade that was strangely and madly in love with him, or superhuman adrenaline-based strength. But then on the other hand a lot of things that shouldn't bother him in the slightest did, such as someone glancing at him the wrong way, using a certain word wrong, or even generally existing in Izaya's case. He realized this wasn't average but, continuing with his previous statement, he didn't really care. "Suit yourself," the doctor shrugged as the thick, somewhat high-pitched slams of a kitchen knife smacking down against a wooden cutting board rapidly pounded through his ears and the shallow noise of some vegetable being impaled and split open between the impacting force. The tone blurred in the blonde's ears as he felt himself zoning again. It was a force he was done attempting to control. If his mind wanted to jump off the ledge then so be it as long as it was quaint for good this time. "You know, I was thinking that maybe we should let Izaya-san shower off. He's been reopening his wounds a lot lately with his struggling, it would be bad if they were to become infected."  
"Hm?" This caught his attention, and the bigger of the two finally turned his head over his shoulder to glance at the doctor who hadn't lifted his own shaded eyes, still focusing fully on the radishes that were being thoroughly chopped into bits for a salad that was probably a quarter of the way prepared. "Struggling? He's been pretty calm when I'm around." The thought of Izaya throwing a form of temper tantrum appeared strange in his eyes but there was no question that it was possible. The information broker hadn't been in control of his situation for nearing three days now when control was everything he based himself around. That was bound to change him up at least a little, right? "That's because you sleep like a rock, Shizuo. He seems fine when he's awake but in the middle of the nights it gets pretty bad, he's flailing and screaming in his sleep and…" Shinra trailed off as he lifted up the cutting board, swiping his hand along the top quickly and efficiently dusting the radishes into a larger bowel, reaching for a few slightly over-ripened apples. Izaya? Screaming and flailing? That was even harder to picture. Shinra said that he did it in his sleep though so there was no doubt it was possible. There was no doubt that the flea wouldn't be caught dead causing such a degrading and embarrassing scene in front of people he attempted to taint into mildly respecting him by choice, but if he weren't even awake then it was easily possible. Shinra sighed, continuing the words that had lost their voice as his focus faded into the meal that he was preparing before. "If he'd just take the medication it would help him, and us mind you, sleep a lot easier. It would numb the pain and barely leaves remaining side effects, just a relaxer that…"  
"Wait." Shizuo's tone took on a blank, blunt tint to it as the cigarette that was previously raised to his lips lowered back down curtly. "You're telling me that he's practically _choosing _to hurt like that?" Shinra obviously caught on to the horribly familiar voice that the blonde had possessed, the one of irritation that sent cold tingles down the listener's spine and caught the attention of even those who weren't intentionally listening in the first place. "Well we haven't told him about his panics yet, we weren't sure if he'd like us knowing he's in pain like that but…"  
"And you're just going to let him not take the pills to help? Just because he says no?" Shizuo continued as if Shinra had never begun speaking again. The cigarette that was gently positioned between the blonde's fingers was quickly and easily crushed, brownish powder squirting out the other end and fluttering down to the lower apartment levels like debrees, glittering in the warm sun before vanishing from sight, and the white paper remains tossed after them as Shizuo turned slowly, his fists gripping tighter. _Calm down. _The voice said. 'Shut the hell up.' He replied back without any reluctance at all. Shinra sighed, placing his kitchen knife gently on the counter as if the man who was unnecessarily furious at him wasn't the beast of Ikebukuro but a small child, chocolate brown eyes meeting those of a honey-glazed color as he spoke calmly, cooly, and efficiently in time. "_I'm_ trying to help him twice as much as he's trying to help himself!" Shizuo snarled loudly, probably to the extent of where the lower and upper levels could hear each word spewed from the angry man's mouth. "If he wants to hurt so bad then I'll just…!"  
_Ring ring. Ring ring. _

Of course. Whenever he was in the center of his rage, preparing to release the honestly pointless anger and feel the strength rush over him, the phone would ring just as it did on that fateful day with the flea. After a few moments of "mhm" "yes?" "uh oh" and "I'll be right there," Shinra clicked his mobile phone shut and rushed to grab the unfinished remains of his salad from the counter, stuffing a few leaves into his mouth as he dashed across the room to the medical bag that was placed on the coffee table close to Izaya's door in case he needed it, the doctor practically tossing mass objects in and out before zipping the bag, slinging it around his wrist, and running to the door. "Where are you going?!" Shizuo called out, stepping forward to rush after before the brunette skidded to a halt in the doorway, both his voice and expression careless and rushed. "I have to head out, a higher up member of some sort of high-and-mighty organization needs a doctor to treat a fatal wound undercover! I'll be home by tonight, tell Celty that I'm sorry!" He then slammed the door behind him. Feeling demotivated despite his prior attempt to nearly lift a table and toss it, Shizuo then turned to allow himself to collapse on the black, cushy sofa once more. Instead he heard the front door fling open once more, slamming against the wall and squeaking on its hinges as Shinra's head poked back in. "I almost forgot! Make complete sure Izaya gets a shower, alright? Make sure he doesn't run away through it either also. I'm counting on you, Shizuo!" And then, once more, he was gone with a slam of the wooden door that rang throughout the generously sized apartment, trembling the walls and the floors for a split moment and leaving, once again, pure uneventful silence.

_'Give him a shower.' _Psh. There was no way that he'd go near the flea in a shower; just picturing that sent him nearly gagging to the floor. Why did he have to do dirty work like this? Izaya didn't really need a shower did he? But it was true, if his wounds grew to be infected from being torn (resulting from the idiot not taking the freaking medication) then he'd be worse off than he probably was from the start. Still, it was idiotic that _he _was the one to have to do it. "You're a bastard, Shinra," Shizuo growled, gritting his teeth as he made his way to the flea's room, flinging the door open so forcefully that it might've left an indentation in the flat wall behind it. "Get up," he growled, quick and to the point. He wanted this over with with as little teasing and annoyance from the raven-haired male who didn't even have to glance up to be able to recognize the voice. "Good morning to you too, Shizu-chan," he chimed softly, blinking up at the ceiling with carefree crimon eyes. Celty had apparently brought him some clothes back from his apartment, Shizuo noticed uncaringly. Where Izaya had previously been shirtless he had his old outfit back, fresh, clean, and free of tears. How many of the same jacket did he have anyways? That clarified why he never stunk too horribly despite always seeming to wear the same thing. The brunette was laying with his hands under his head, lifting it slightly so that he could stare more comfortably up at the ceiling, probably plotting something or another since Shizuo doubted he was rarely so content with being locked up for such a long period of time. "It's not morning and hasn't been morning for a few hours now. Now get up." He was hardly in the mood for conversing, never being in the mood in the first place but feeling especially on edge today for some reason, possibly because he was already stirred up with Shinra's carelessness and Izaya's stubborn choices. "I obviously can't stand with my wrist locked in, remember? You really are a protozoan. Besides, how was I supposed to know it's not morning? I don't exactly have a watch," the brunette sighed in mock exasperation, stretching his arms upwards and finally looking over to the fuming blonde blankly, a trace of a grin cast over his mouth as it regularly was but no other sign of expression being shown. "Are you letting me go now?"  
"Shinra wants me to give you a shower." The words weren't spoken in the best way possible. Izaya raised an eyebrow, his lips curling slightly into a cat-like grin as he revealed how humorous he found the blonde's statement to be. "My my, Shizu-chan, I always thought you disliked touching me." He started to laugh as the glance of realization paled Shizuo's face entirely, honey eyes narrowing as he growled and stormed forward, unclicking the handcuffs and grabbing the uninjured wrist of his enemy, beginning to drag him off. Smiling up despite hardly having a chance to stand and partially being dragged along the apartment floor, Izaya continued in his playful musing. "I didn't know you were into that type of thing, Shizu-chan, I'm really surprised to be honest. Have you always wanted to see me naked?" Damn it all, Shizuo thought, doing everything he could to restrain himself from choking the words right out of the informant. Arriving at the bathroom and tossing the brunette in with little pity for the soft yelp he gave when he hit the white-tiled floors, the blonde slammed the door behind him and stood outside, crossing his arms tightly and squeezing at his biceps to try and release the power fusing through his hands without destroying something in the home. Celty and Shinra wouldn't be too happy if they returned to a wrecked house after all. He waited, listening silently as the water clicked on, waiting for it to be over as soon as physically possible. Why was he even doing this? If he had just left he wouldn't have to supervise the flea like some stupid babysitter. He hated this man and he was doing enough of a good deed by not finishing him off, so why was he putting himself through this? _I'm sure everyone appreciates it._ Celty and Shinra, maybe, but Izaya? That louse didn't appreciate anything. He'd take a peace treaty, sign it, then stab you in the back of the neck within the next hour. For damn's sake, _he convinced people to kill themselves for the hell of it! _It was a wonder that Celty and Shinra even cared enough to take care of him. What was so special about him anyways? Just because he was smart didn't mean he was worth the information he possessed. Just because he was the best broker in Ikebukuro didn't mean that he was automatically someone of high importance that could get away with anything and everything. He did what he did and yet Shizuo was patronized for just roughing him up a little… _A lot. _Damn the voice in his mind. Damn everything.

He sighed as the water finally sizzled to a halt, the few last drips from the cheap showerhead clicking against the tiles after around seven minutes had passed. There was a shuffle of clothing before a symphonic knock reached the other side of the doorway. "Done," he heard the collected voice call before he stepped to the side and opened the door. The moment Izaya stepped out his wrist was grabbed again; Shizuo thanked the situation before he realized it that he had grabbed the uninjured one once more. Why did he even care? Maybe the information broker deserved a little sting once in a while just to remind him what the blonde could and would still do. But whatever. Feeling that the skin was still wet and slightly slippery, he didn't want to take his chances though. Knowing Izaya they'd get halfway back to the room before the flea would slip out and take off. Considering this with a ninety percent certainty Shizuo instead reached up and gripped onto the brunette's hood, the glance of disappointment evident in Izaya's eyes proving that Shizuo had been right; he was planning on running. The hood was wet, the fur trimming it soft but dampened by the small droplets of water that slid down jet-black strands, collecting at the base of the hood and in turn residing on the blonde's fingers. It felt nice, the water. Maybe he'd take another shower that night.

Glancing down by pure coincidence, Shizuo realized that Izaya had his bandaged hand curled around his stomach gently as he walked. Despite the flea's expression being free of pain or any form of irritation he was holding himself lightly and seemed to walk just barely slower than the ex-bartender usually saw of him. Was he in pain even now? And there it came, the wave of guilt was back and evident as ever. When would it just go away? He'd done enough to make up for his 'mistake', hadn't he?

Reaching the room Shizuo pushed open the cracked door with his shoulder, marching in and pushing Izaya down onto the bed, holding him there by the hood until his fingers successfully locked around the handcuffs and he clipped them to what he thought was the right sizing around the flea's wrist. Despite his judgement though, Izaya winced slightly, holding up the arm and pointing to it. "A little tight, don't you think?" he questioned but wasn't met with a response, the blonde automatically turning to leave again. The brunette groaned about something but he wasn't listening and honestly hardly cared, nearly slamming the door behind him before actually looking up to see what was in front of him. "Good morning, Celty-san," Izaya called out, holding up his hand politely since he couldn't exactly wave with a broken wrist. Shizuo simply fell quiet, stepping aside as Celty started to type. Something was in the dullahan's hand, a small brown paper bag that was crunched up between her fingers, the contents barely squeezing in to the unsquished bottom of its container. When she had finished typing she held up the phone not to the informant but to Shizuo who leaned forward to read it with more clarity. 'I had an idea while I was riding around,' it stated in the small but easily understandable font. When she held up the bag both of the boys saw the insignia at the same moment. On the front was the familiarly circular, sea green logo of a pawprint with text written in the center, 'Ikebukuro Pet Supplies.' "Shinra's going to have a fit if he found a rat or something in his home, you know that right?" Shizuo sighed, wondering if Celty was tired of the general lifestyle or something that would propel her into buying a pet. More typing. 'No, it's not an animal. I found something in there that might help a little though.' Raising her dark gloved hand she allowed her phone to slip back up the sleeve of her leathery clothing before unrolling the bag and slipping out a very distinct object.

There was a second of pure, uninterrupted silence before Izaya started laughing so hard and loudly that it seemed like he might choke on his own breath. Shizuo himself was completely speechless, unable to take his eyes off of the thick leather dog collar she displayed. Was she serious? Celty's neck and shoulders craned as if she were glancing between the two opposite reactions before she withdrew her phone once more and began fiercely typing. 'Is something wrong with it? I thought that if Izaya could walk around a little more he might heal faster.' After both males were able to read her writing Shizuo raised his hand to his forehead, rubbing his eye lightly with a very intentional sigh. The informant, who had finally recovered from his spout of humor long enough to roll to his side and grin widely as he spoke, attempted to explain their thoughts to the confused rider. "You and Shinra must really like me to try and keep me as a pet."  
'Of course not! I just thought that you'd like it more to be able to stand up every now and then.'  
"Right, Celty-san, I understand completely." Still he was no doubt amused by the situation. Shizuo finally lowered his palm from his head, walking around the bed and gripping Izaya's arms behind his back, the brunette blinking up in mild surprise as the blonde unclipped the handcuffs once more. He probably had connected them too tight, Shizuo realized, the distinct raw circle of skin around a pale wrist proving it boldly. Whatever. Celty, who appeared somewhat embarrassed despite having no facial features to express it, stepped forward and slung the collar around the informants neck, obviously having prepared for him to figure out how to unhook it without looking and pulling a padlock out of the bag as well to make certain that he wouldn't be able to unlatch it. Izaya, still in a joking mood, snickered lightly as he continued to tease on. "For a minute I was sure that this was just another play toy to surprise Shinra." Celty wasn't amused apparently, Izaya wincing and finally (thankfully) falling quiet when she smacked him across his still throbbing head with her phone. After a moment of hooking up she finally stepped back and Shizuo dropped the informant's arms, circling the bed once more to lean back against the wall, trying to adjust the image in his head. The flea, despite his endless chattering, obviously seemed uncomfortable with the fitting collar pushing slightly against the bruises around his neck. Celty had bought a chain that she measured to approximately reach across the room but just to that extent, not far enough to allow him to rush out the door. She obviously had his opinion in mind, Shizuo would've just let him lay there until he healed no matter how extensive his urge to move around was, but this worked fine. Without his switchblade or any sharp object in the room he wouldn't be able to cut through the padded leather of the collar, no matter how awkward it was to put an accessory engineered for animals on a human. It worked and that was all that mattered. "Can't you trust me? This is somewhat uncomfortable," the flea sighed, running his fingers around the circumference of the collar in an attempt to stretch it out slightly. "You'll get used to it," Shizuo replied uncaringly before turning to leave the room. "Shinra's gone off to do some emergency surgery, he'll probably be back before tonight," he called to the dullahan who typed that she understood and gave Izaya a small wave, clicking in an apology onto her phone before turning and closing the door behind her.

**Agh! I really, really hope this chapter wasn't boring. I'm writing it pretty late and will post it tomorrow since I'm horribly tired but seriously motivated to write. Does that ever happen to yall? I've decided to split this into two different chapters since it's going on seven pages in Word and that's way too long in itself. Thank you so much for reading again, it's exciting to write this despite the mistakes and all I've probably made. Feel free to review anything, though if you leave a bad review please tell me what in the story made you dislike it so that I can correct it in later chapters. Have a great night, or morning in this case! **


	5. Guilt Confirmed

**Ahh! I'm sorry for such a long wait for the update, I've just been catching up with school and all. I'm so happy that people are reading and enjoying this story, it really means the world to me! I'm not sure how great this chapter will be since it's been a while but here we go. ^^  
Warning: This chapter sort of flips through characters a little more than I would like. Please bear with me, I'll make sure not to do this so often in the next chapter. **

**IkaruSakurai: I love you too, so very much ;-; I'm grateful for you pointing this out to me, I often do run on sentences without any realization that I do it and need to check over my writings a little better next time. So thank you for telling me! Also I can't really say if this is going to be shizaya or not because I don't know myself ;-; I guess it depends on what yall all want. I don't mind writing shizaya, though it'll probably take a very long time since it's going to be a fun challenge to try and get them to like each other without falling into the OOC range. ^o^**

**Sakuki-yuu: It's perfectly fine! Whatever feels more comfortable to you. I'm really glad that you like the story and I thank you so much for reading and reviewing! Means the world!**

**Gunso: Thank you! I was worried that mine would be a little OOC as well so the comments on how in character it is really boosts my confidence to keep writing this! I'm so glad that you like the story!**

The moment the unstable walls of the semi-cheap apartment rumbled with the force necessary to close the door the dullahan spun on her heels to face Shizuo directly. The curtness in her movements along with how quickly the fingers of a single gloved hand flew across the tiny keyboard that they had no doubt easily adjusted to accurately clicking upon made him positive that, if she were to have a face, she would be boldly staring directly at him. "What?" He asked with a subtle hint of a rebound to his voice, a daring tone that countered her bold motions. As far as he knew he hadn't done anything wrong. He had even been nice to the flea, which was far beyond what he was comfortable with. What would cause her to be either so forward or so angry all of the sudden?

'Something's wrong' was all that appeared on the tiny screen despite how many times he read the text over, Shizuo tilting his head slightly with little expression as he honestly had no clue what she was talking about. "Hm?" he questioned, wondering if she meant that something was wrong with the flea or with the situation in general or…  
'With you. You seem distressed, it's not like you.' What? He wasn't upset in the slightest and was nowhere near bad off enough to be called _distressed _of all things_. _Sure he was a little pissed that he was wasting his time babysitting the arrogant informant but it was what he had to do to finally shove his guilt out for sure. What was she talking about? Even if he did feel somewhat bad for how immensely he had overdone it he wasn't going to admit it. Izaya deserved what he got and everyone knew it, even if it wasn't entirely morally right. 'You're bothered by this aren't you? You wouldn't help Izaya in a normal situation. You feel bad.' And there she went once again. Celty was a close friend of Shizuo's simply because she could read him like an open book where most others only saw the beastly violence that personified when he grew angry. They only looked at him as a ticking time-bomb, as Celty had probably experienced enough discrimination herself to understand that there was always good underneath, no matter if he did have enough physical strength to throw a fridge across the street.  
"I'm fine," he growled back, hardly wanting to have a heart to heart conversation like this. Celty knew him well enough to understand that he didn't enjoy getting all touchy and that he was hardly an emotional person in the slightest besides the tiny kink of a violence spurt that would pop up every now and then. She should've known better than to start something like this, especially after he had been previously sitting in the same room as _him._ 'That's why you're helping him, isn't it? You feel guilty. Answer me, Shizuo.'  
"Maybe it is, why does it matter?" he finally shot back, allowing himself to move past her in a sidesweeping motion and fall back onto the comfortable but somewhat aged grey couch he had been sleeping on for the past few days. He honestly saw no reason why he should return home. He had no one to go back to, not now that Kasuka was famous and touring consistently, and staying with Celty and Shinra was at least mildly pleasant enough. Despite them rarely being home it was far more entertaining than strolling the streets and getting mad at everything that came near him. He hated violence, and despite the informant literally being right next door he felt that this was a calm atmosphere to rest up in for a while… but he knew that wasn't the honest reason why he was still there. Even so, there was no way she was going to get him to admit that he cared in the slightest for the flea because he didn't. He didn't at all.  
'You've been daydreaming a lot lately.'  
"I always do that."  
'I mean a lot more than you usually do.' It was becoming increasingly aggravating to find ways to reply as he didn't understand her purpose for saying what she said. It was like their mild conversation was spinning in a circle, a pinwheel, and no matter how differently the words shifted they were still the same words as before. "What are you trying to say?" he finally retorted, hardly caring to stifle the heat in his voice as it was either that or sending the table directly in front of him flying, the adrenaline already coursing through his muscles and sending him in a very uncomfortable state of edginess. There was a pause, her fingers hovering softly over her keypad as she thought with her mysteriously invisible brain of how to respond in the best way possible. Celty easily knew that using the wrong words would send him over the edge, especially with how irritated he already appeared to be. There was no need to poke at him any further, she'd get to the point, even if it was a risky one. She began typing once more, her fingers pounding with tiny clicks and clacks against the small black keyboard with brilliant accuracy as she had mastered typing; it was her only form of verbal communication after all. Finally, after a moment of watching Shizuo glare at the ceiling in his aggravated state (though thankfully he still had the patience he usually had when he was calm), she lifted the screen once more.

'I'm not trying to indicate that I think you like Izaya now. I know that you still hate him. But I've noticed that you do still seem to feel guilty and I wanted to say that I understand and don't blame you for what you did.' Celty knew that Shizuo had read up to this point by how his honey eyes flickered up to examine her blankly for a moment, the dullahan somewhat nervous by how she couldn't see whether he was growing more angry or less as he wasn't really physically reacting. He then continued to read, revealed by how his eyes started dashing silently from line to line once more.  
'I know this isn't really comfortable for you but I'm grateful that you're helping care for him despite everything he's done. I've talked with Shinra and he feels the same and, even though he probably won't say it, I'm sure Izaya is thankful for the help as well. It's rare that anyone puts much consideration into him. So thank you, Shizuo.'

The male paused, slowly allowing his glance to fall to the knees of his smooth black dress pants, falling quiet for a moment, which indicated to Celty enough in itself. The words, despite how cheesily they were worded, had reached to him at least slightly. "Thanks," he finally said, a single, short word but it was enough to relieve her. The rider felt herself relax slightly as her neck tilted in a motion similar to if she were nodding as she deleted the long strand of text and retyped a much shorter one. 'No problem. I'm going to make dinner.' Shizuo nodded, pausing in a moment of contemplation before rising once more and placing the tips of his fingers in his pockets, making his way behind her to the kitchen. He might as well help out a little, as he realized he had been somewhat mooching off of the scientist and the rider with how little he did to repay the residence he was taking up in their house and the ruckus he made in his irritation towards the pest. His time working in multiple fast food restaurants and the very slightly longer amount of time spent as a bartender had taught him enough about the kitchen that he could at least do something to help out. Besides, with no offense intended towards Celty, Shinra and everyone would probably feel a little more relieved to eat food prepared by someone with taste buds.

Brilliant. He should've expected Celty to come up with a such a silly idea as this one. He had been chuckling to himself for possibly an hour over the ordeal and even now it was still strangely humorous to him despite how honestly blank the situation was. He always was able to find amusement in things others found unfortunate though, it was just who he was. It did make life a little happier though.  
A dog collar. Of all things they'd tie him down with it was something like this. He never expected something like this to happen which was both strange and exciting, a fresh start to an overall somewhat irritating past few days. If someone had told him that he'd wake up chained with a collar to a bed in Shinra's apartment he might've laughed at how awkward the situation sounded, but here he was, clawing lightly at the thick leather in an attempt to mindlessly create a decent sized scratch, wincing as the force from his finger pushed against the deep bruises that remained from Shizu-chan's vice-like grip. It was somewhat humiliating to still have those marks but he hardly cared about something as meager as embarrassment, it hardly effecting him, especially since he wasn't exactly allowed to leave the small room in the first place.

And despite him entertaining himself with mild thoughts, he was horribly bored. Despite the amusement he found in the dog collar he did have to thank the dullahan for considering it. The moment he had finally stepped down from the bed his legs were impaled with a sharp sting, a numbness that indicated that he hadn't used them in far too long, even his body scolding him by this point. Since then he had been pacing around the room to return the feeling to each step and to revitalize the glory of being able to roam around, even if there was little distance he could go before the leather would tug painfully at the bruises and jerk him back. He had already searched the room entirely for a sharp object to work the material apart, only concluding and finding enough satisfaction with the corner of the empty dresser against the wall. The wood was new enough to withstand a little scraping and as long as no one walked in or anything he could be gone by the next morning. But until he was sure that everyone was asleep he was left doing what he had been doing for a while now; pacing. Despite the slightly and newly extended freedom it wasn't very satisfying to hardly be able to reach anything, but it was better than being trapped on the bed for a while like Shizu-chan had no doubt planned. And Shizu-chan… It interested the informant that the protozoan was still around at all. It was kind of him already to have dragged the brunette back at all. Honestly after all of the trouble he had caused Izaya was nearly positive that he would've either been beaten to death or left to suffer in the alley. It was enough of a surprise to have woken up in a softer bed than the one he had at home but it only continued to confuse him to what the blonde's motives were. That was what irritated him so greatly about Shizuo Heiwajima, and also what excited him so much about poking and teasing at him. It was a bitter-sweet complex, how strange the brute was compared to other regular humans. Izaya couldn't map him, couldn't understand why he did things and what drove him to certain reactions. But either way, it was a complex that he honestly didn't mind too much. It was always rewarding somehow to see him break in his irritation, the twitchy, angry grin plastered onto his snarling face, even if the informant didn't understand exactly what he did at some times other than simply exist to get a large object flung at him in attempt to finally crush him.

He chuckled softly, staring up at the ceiling with a gentle smile that would appear carefree and relaxed, though was far from. He was bored and he was conflicted; trying to understand Shizu-chan was like trying to translate a language that he'd never heard of, probably even a little more difficult than that. Why didn't the brute just kill him? There were many, many cases that Izaya had noted where a human would claim to want something desperately and then refuse to pull through with it when the time came, but this was different. The man literally did threaten him on a near-daily basis with objects that could easily harm him internally or break a few bones if he weren't quick enough to dodge every time. But yet the moment the blonde had gotten a true, easy chance to kill the man he had loathed for years he let it slide… but continued to hate him afterwards, as if he didn't have any choice to allow the brunette to live. He was reasonless and it set Izaya on edge, something that either excited him or bothered him depending on his mood. But for now… "You're so stupid, Shizu-chan," he muttered to the ceiling as he finally fell back to lay on the edge of the unmade bed, not minding the ridges that the uneven blankets created under his scraped and bound back despite the slight sting of his skin protesting the sudden contact. "If you were smart you would've killed me." He laughed at how pathetic he sounded, smiling up in a playful manner as if the ceiling itself were frowning down upon him. He feared death, it being quite possibly the only thing he feared at all. The outcome, whatever was to happen to him after he closed his eyes for the final time, wasn't something he looked forward to in the slightest. And yet… _You deserve it. _He heard in a specific protozoan's voice. His smile only widened.

Within possibly thirty prolonged minutes (he couldn't tell exactly, he still wasn't provided with a clock other than the fluctuations of the natural light granted by the sun) there was finally a soft rapping at the door. Calling out in a minor greeting to whoever was knocking, sure that Shizu-chan would've just busted the door out of his path and feeling content towards the two homeowners, he approached the door as best he could before he felt the familiar and increasingly annoying tug at his neck once more. The door swung open with a soft creak and Celty entered, holding a small bowl of rice. Setting the container down for a moment so that she could accurately type she held out her phone in a simple reply to his greeting. 'Good afternoon. I brought you some food.' The moment the rider had slipped her phone back into her sleeve and exchanged the bowl from her hands to his he had hastily thanked her and began to practically scarf down the small portion, the dullahan standing still as if staring in blank surprise at how starved he appeared to be. Shinra had ordered that their guest eat lightly in case he grew nauseous at any point but he wasn't starved. Did eating a lot mean that his body was using the energy from the food to heal faster? She'd have to ask Shinra when he returned home from the surgery that he was probably finished up with by now.

Within a few moments the bowl was completely cleaned and Izaya released a soft breath before smiling wholeheartedly up at her, thanking her politely and setting the bowl down on the blank dresser top once more. If it weren't for her past knowledge of him Celty might've even assumed that the informant was an amazingly kind man from that deceiving smile, the one that would make his crimson eyes light up as if they were the color of candy rather than the color of blood. But she and other she knew had had too much experience with the brunette and she hardly trusted his apparently glowing health; he was a good faker. There was currently no way to tell whether he was as painless as he appeared or not.

Allowing her phone to drop into her pale palm, which was free of any glove now that she had changed into her comfortable pajamas, Celty began to scatter out her words efficiently. 'I talked with Shinra through texting a few moments ago. He said that he'll check on your wounds tomorrow morning to see how you're healing. Depending on what he takes from it you may be allowed to leave soon.' Great, the informant thought in slight relief, holding back a soft laugh at how nurse-like the rider sounded at the moment. Her and Shinra would make a good team in that sort of field if it weren't for one being semi-sadistic when it came to cutting people open and the other having a somewhat low understanding of what was socially acceptable. Like putting a dog collar on a person or something akin to that.

Celty watched silently as Izaya stretched his arms into the air, being careful to put most of the strain in his left arm which was undamaged compared to his right's wrist still being snapped, before collapsing backwards onto the bed behind him. He seemed perfectly fine, energetic as always, but it wasn't difficult to recognize the fraction of a second in which the informant had just slightly winced when his back hit the blankets. If she remembered correctly he had both road burn and various heavy scrapes on his back from being slammed against the walls and ground by Shizuo, and despite his calm composure it probably hurt immensely to be putting pressure on the wounds. If he'd only take the painkillers Shinra had offered things would be easier, but Celty understood that there were reasons why Izaya would be picky with what he trusted to ingest; there were countless that were probably not conflicted in the slightest with poisoning him, he wasn't exactly a favorite around Ikebukuro or really anywhere.

Taking the emptied bowl she gave a small wave, unsure on what to discuss with the red-eyed male who appeared content just laying back and relaxing for a moment after he had nearly swallowed down an entire meal. It was rare that she had words to say to Izaya, honestly having been nervous to converse with him too greatly with his famous reputation of being able to read and manipulate anyone and everyone. She had taken courier jobs from him in the past on multiple occasions where he questionably convinced a few teenagers out of suicide, but hardly spoke to him otherwise unless she needed to know something specifically that she couldn't discover on her own. She didn't mind helping him… but that didn't make her trust him entirely quite yet. "Thank you for the meal. Good night, Celty-san." But despite the obvious reputation, his respectful demeanor did appear genuine. Maybe Izaya really was grateful. Maybe that was just what he was trying to get them to think. He was interesting to say the least.

**I'm not too sure about how good this chapter was but thank you for reading either way. ^^' I was also wondering if yall wanted this to turn into a Shizaya (Izaya X Shizuo) fic or not. It could, or it doesn't have to, I don't mind either way, so if you have an opinion on either please answer in the reviews. ^^ Thank you for reading and have a very good night. Or morning. It's somewhere in between when I'm updating this. **


	6. Mentally Burned

**And the answer stands! This will probably be a Shizaya fic. I'm nervous since I've never wrote anything romance-based, but this honestly won't be very romancy anyways since they're not romancy people. It'll be very subtle but I'll try to make it work. For the billionth time I completely love and appreciate everybody who supports this story ^^ It's very uplifting to read through the reviews and know that I've been doing alright thus far. This chapter marks the end of my plans for this story so I'll need to think up some ideas, if anyone has any feel free to comment them. Other than that… all I can say is thank you. Thank you very much ^^  
sakuki-yuu: Alright! Your vote has been counted, haha. Please tell me if it starts becoming OC so that I can fix it. Thank you! ^^  
IkaruSakurai: Don't worry, I 100% agree XD While Izaya would probably be the one to jump to Shizuo to try and get to him it just feels weird with Izaya being the one pushing the hearts forward. Since Shizuo is technically the main character of this fic (the one who's perspective is more widely used), he'll no doubt be the main of the Shizaya. I can't stand Izuo that much either, so I understand where you're coming from. XD And thank you, by the way. ^^ I'll try my best to keep this entertaining.  
MusicIsaDrug18: Thank you! I'll be making it Shizaya, though it probably will be very vague and slow for a very long while to avoid going into the OOC range. **

**Run on sentence warning: First paragraph. ;-; It didn't seem right no matter how I tried to separate it.  
Continued warning: I'm sort of braindead for tonight so please forgive the run-ons for now. I've done my best to correct the ones that I can think of and I should run through this and fix them later but for now please bear with me. **

Finally the day was over. Despite the particularly long expanse of time each day seemed to take up compared to what they used to, this specific day had by far been the most tedious. Whether it was Shinra with his usual hyper and absent-minded self or Celty's innocent cluelessness (He wasn't even going to begin with Izaya), Shizuo was overall downright irritated from the minute he had woken up to the moment, this moment, when he had fallen back to rest on the thankfully welcoming black couch once more. **  
**The fabric melted beneath his back as if the heat of his aggravation were pushing him down rather than his sinking being due to his weight. Despite the numerous times he had slept in the same pair of clothes he refused to change out of them, not here at least where anything could happen at any moment. He didn't feel comfortable falling into such a revealing state in front of others and far preferred just leaving his vest and dress pants on. Despite the intention to sleep, Shizuo hardly felt tired. His eyes were heavy, slipping to close before fluttering open once more, but his mind was working at its highest speed to address things that he had already thought about far too many times. Why did he care? Why was he still here? But no matter how many times the question popped up he was never rewarded with a reasonable answer. And yet he stayed. It was as if there were some invisible force field blocking him from the exit of the small apartment. It was easier to think of it that way, at least. Realizing for the fiftieth time that his choice to stay was entirely voluntarily only served to piss him off further.

It was stupid. On a normal basis he would check to see if the person he injured was alive, get them to Shinra, then go. He wouldn't stay waiting like a homeless puppy for anyone, let alone the flea of all people. Honestly the bastard was less trouble dead than alive, so why did Shizuo even care to keep him breathing? Sighing in a breath that ended in a soft groan he slipped off his tinted shades between his index and middle fingers and set them on the coffee table, uncaring to the clink they made when they were placed just slightly too forcefully. The blonde thanked everything that he didn't usually have dreams, as without them sleep was really the only way to get his mind to shut up entirely. Couldn't he just be done with this like he was with everything else? He never cared this much about any matter, let alone one as stupid and honestly unimportant as this.

But right as he was allowing his eyes to sink into the comforting darkness that overwhelmed him right before he fell into unconsciousness a noise startled him back awake. 'Damn it,' Shizuo thought, another tick added to the list of things that were building onto his increasingly hard-to-control nerves. Sitting up he heard the noise again, a soft thump against the closest wall to him as if something behind it were purposefully tapping it. If Izaya was seriously knocking on the walls for the hell of it then he was done with the self-restraint, he'd choke the stupid flea and break his other arm while he was at it.

Shizuo rose to his feet, growling quietly as he made his way to the already abused door and threw it open, subconsciously wondering if the noise had woken Celty and Shinra but the rage incarnate in him hardly caring as he glanced inside with the expression of a hungry beast. He had expected to see Izaya there directly in front of the door, smirking playfully as he usually did when he came up with some annoying plot and opening his mouth to spurt out some clever insult that would earn him a new broken bone… if he were there at all. Instead when the blonde glanced forward to see what was knocking so loudly he saw the extended, thick-linked chain that Celty had bought, swinging slightly to rap against the wall as the form it was connect to moved. Izaya was instead not in bed asleep but at the window, sitting on the edge of the blankets with his head turned towards the enraged intruder with a slight tilt and an unusually blank expression. That was… strange, Shizuo thought to himself, feeling his anger fade just slightly with the surprise of seeing the flea without at least some form of expression. He almost seemed sad in a way. Despite how little he cared for the informant the blonde felt his heart slightly fall at the expression in front of him, the one that seemed to last so much longer than a split second where Izaya's mouth wasn't upturned into a cat-like grin and his eyes weren't narrowed with their bright, mischievous tone. But within a flash of a moment that face was gone, replaced with the gentle and extremely convincing smile that was almost always irritatingly there, almost as if the previous expression had never even existed on the flea's face in the first place. "Hello Shizu-chan," he mused, his voice far too polite and carefree to be anything good. No matter whether he sounded like it or not, Izaya was always up to something. He was never worth trusting, especially not now. "Shut that thing up," Shizuo snarled somewhat, pointing his finger accusingly in the direction of the chain that ground against the wall when Izaya turned his head to look, further proving the blonde's point. "I can't exactly control it," he replied without a care to his voice, a small glint of triumph lightening his ruby eyes as he continued, "But if it bothers you so badly then you can easily break the chain." It was tempting to say the least, Shizuo already being pissed as all hell and in the mood to shatter something that was more durable than an insect, but the knowledge that Izaya would overcome him with a trick as simple as that was enough to stop him. Instead he gritted his teeth, fists squeezing shut to try and channel the power rushing through them out with little success. How easy it would be to punch the stupid smirk right off of Izaya's face. But something was stopping him, most likely the obvious anger that Shinra and Celty would have if he did. He was sick of having everyone treat him like a monster and it would be bad to lose the last two people who acted at least mildly like he was normal.  
"If I did that then you'd run off and probably get shot up while you're seen weak," Shizuo grumbled with little hesitation to the cold words, his honey-brown eyes darting aside to glare at the wall because he could hardly stand to look at that face anymore without feeling the stirring of irritation within his chest once more. Izaya was no doubt probably the most hated man in Ikebukuro. He manipulated nearly everyone, gangs and mobsters included, being too smart for them to overwhelm him before he sent them down to the ground for no reason other than to see how the situation reacted. He entertained himself with other's pain, which earned him plenty of enemies. He'd just chosen Shizuo to torture for a longer period of time, to the blonde's dread. "And here I was thinking that you'd like me dead, Shizu-chan," the informant mused, his voice softening and his eyes narrowing into the smirk that was all too similar to the one he gained when he knew he was about to push his opponent over the edge. It was far too familiar by now for his liking. "I'll be the one to finally kill you, not some yellow scarf idiots, and I'll do it when you don't look like you've gone through a blender."  
"I figure looking like I've gone through a blender is an upgrade," the crimson-eyed male retorted, sighing as the annoying chain shuffled again when he turned to actually face the figure he was somewhat conversing with. It was weird, having an actual discussion with Shizuo without any threats or physical contact at all, no matter how cruel the comments they made to each other were. Usually having to talk with people of much lower intelligence than himself irritated him, and yet he almost found it comforting to have someone to talk to for the first time in a while, someone to tease. He couldn't exactly poke at the homeowners unless he wanted to risk getting cuffed again rather than chained (it was sad that those were his only two options), and that left only Shizuo who'd up until now just stormed out of the room after a few minutes. Now he was leaning against the wall, his fists shoved into his pockets to try and ignore the small pause in verbal jabs between them, a stubborn glare drawn as if with permanent marker upon his scowling face. Knowing that the blonde couldn't lash out at him with Celty and Shinra acting as practical babysitters it wasn't as much of a risk to tease. This made it both amusing to see how badly Shizuo wanted to harm something but couldn't and somewhat boring… as everything else had been for a long while. He laid in the same bed without any form of entertainment for around three or four days by this point (he hadn't bothered to keep a very accurate tab on the exact amount of time) and, besides listening to the outside conversations and peering out the same window recalculating twenty different ways to scale down from it, there was nothing to distract his mind from wandering. He was grateful once he had finally made out the 'good night' Shinra addressed to Celty and the distant shutting of their door, this meant that he could finally make a move to try and break the collar off. Izaya had been anticipating this the entire day, choosing the window seal over the dresser so that he would easily be able to look as if he were just staring out the window if anyone were to come in. His efforts hadn't been in vain, he had managed to dig a small, jagged scrape into the back of the collar (he chose the back so that his jacket's hood would hid the majority of it), but then, of course, the protozoan would ruin his attempt to get out in one night by coming in, scolding him, and then just standing there as if watching to make sure that the informant wouldn't be up to something. He did admit that he didn't mind the company, but Izaya wasn't exactly pleased with the situation that the company came with.  
Suddenly the gentle night's graceful hold over their silence shattered as a shallow, meager cough escaped the brunette's lips. It didn't seem like anything until it continued, increasing in strength until he was gasping slightly, choking for air as his chest rose and fell quickly with the pressure that remained without it. Shizuo stood straight quickly, eyes revealing surprise though, as suspected, he did nothing to help the informant who was beginning to regain control once more. Ruby eyes, which had squeezed shut in a deep, painful wince, flickered open and focused down as he panted just slightly, the last minor cough finally exiting his throat before the silence returned, only thicker and much less comforting. There was a pause, one of knowledge passing between the two as they both stared up at each other, expressions concealing many different things at once. Shizuo was confused before he realized something that the other hoped wouldn't be mentioned until…  
"You're still screwed up, aren't you?" It was a dull awakening to the tensed atmosphere around and Izaya glanced down at his knees with a sigh of surrender, hardly in the mood to talk now that his throat was so stingingly scratchy and his breath had fallen short. "You don't have to say it so rudely," he responded with a final tease, earning a glare as he expected from the larger of the two. "You know Shinra's going to see it when he checks up on you."  
"Not if you don't tell him something's wrong in the first place." There was another pause, one that lasted slightly longer than the previous before a small growl of irritation escaped the blonde's lips and he turned towards the door, grabbing the handle in a crushing grip and shoving the door open once more. When he looked back he noticed what he hadn't been able to in the dark, recognizing just how pale Izaya looked, just how weak his expression was where it had appeared strong in the darkness they were in before. "Just go to bed already," he sighed before walking out and slamming the door behind him, beyond caring if it woke anyone up. He was done with this night, done with everything. Too much was racing through his mind and he either wanted to sleep for the few hours he had left or just go outside for a smoke. His body didn't seem too excited with the choice though and before he had even questioned the decision any further he felt himself falling back to the couch, eyes slipping shut, and his body relaxing. It all narrowed down to the next morning if the flea would get released or not. Why was it so conflicting to him? It wasn't like he cared, if the bastard decided that he'd leave while coughing his guts out then so be it. But something Shizuo didn't agree… He refused to care any further. Within a few more moments the blonde was finally granted the sleep he had wanted for a while.

**It's really late again. I need to get to writing these chapters earlier so that I'm not so tired and won't mess them up as much ^^' Either way, thank you so much for reading and have a nice night. **


	7. Innocent Sleep

**I'm really sorry that this chapter is so late. I typed out most of it but my computer did the whole 'restart in ten minutes' thing when I was away from the screen so I lost it all. That was a little demotivating, but I probably shouldn't have waited so long since I've sorta forgotten my mindset and personalities. I hope this chapter is still good, I'll try to make it extra long. I don't have much time to write lately which isn't too fun but I'll try and write bits and pieces in my free time. I like this story, it's fun to write and see everybody's input, it means a lot. Thank you for reading.  
Kimiyu: Thank you! It means a ton hearing that. **

**Also, I have little medical knowledge so please forgive me if Shinra doesn't make much sense in this. **

It was dreary and humid the next morning, as if the skies were foretelling how 'great' the oncoming day would be. Clouds had swept in overnight and a light shower had transformed the streets of Ikebukuro into a slippery, dark, and damp pit. The rain hadn't just dropped a dazed fog to hover over the city, especially on one of the higher floors of the apartment building, but it had also dragged the smell of dirt, musk, and gangs out of the recesses of the alleyways into the main streets. The smell wafted straight up and Shizuo finally quit trying after attempting to light his third cigarette to relieve his already crumbling nerves. It was so humid that the stupid things, the paper and powder inside that were supposed to revitalize him, wouldn't light for longer than a second. If that wasn't an omen then he didn't know what was.

To make matters worse the entire crowd was in the relatively small living room, which, after a few minutes, made it hard to move around too much without getting too close to anyone. It wasn't normally a problem, but with most of the floor space eliminated by a huge white plastic sheet there was little room to step without having to cross between the couch and the television. The sheet wasn't a beautiful sight, still slightly stained a disgusting salmon color from the blood that wasn't washed well enough off of it from the time it was used a few days prior. To make the atmosphere any worse than it had to be the flea was sitting on the couch shirtless (Shinra made him take off his shirt, just 'in case' he'd have to do extra work) with that stupid, cocky grin of his. Wasn't he worried or something? It wasn't like he could hide whatever that gagging cough was the night before, Shinra was a doctor, licensed or not. Honestly Shinra was probably better than most other doctors since he had been working through dissections and surgeries since he was a kid. The dominant part of the blonde's mind reminded him that if Izaya could pull off his health he would finally be able to leave and die on the street or something, but something else in him didn't agree. If he was seriously getting soft then he really would leave. He still didn't know why he had stayed at the house, but Tom seemed to support whatever it was because he claimed that he didn't really need Shizuo for any of his more recent collections and that staying with Shinra and Celty was good for him. Whatever.

After deciding that he was wasting his time and cigarettes without any hope of a good smoke Shizuo finally entered the house once again, slinging the sliding door behind him shut slightly too forcefully, thankfully not cracking the glass like he did once before. He was already on edge and having to deal with Shinra's overwhelming doctoral rants clogging his simple mind, Izaya's irritating freaking grin or presence in general, and more guilt waves wasn't helping at all. Rather than going to stand near the flea, who was waiting with absolutely no sign of nervousness on the couch, Shizuo leaned back against the wall to examine from afar. Honestly he didn't have anywhere to go with Tom giving him an extended vacation. It wasn't like he had any other friends or close relatives other than Kasuka, who was too busy with his prosperous acting career to talk much anymore. If Izaya had to stay then that would give him a reason to stay as well without having to admit to Celty and Shinra that he was staying partially to be around others that accepted him. It was rare to find anyone that didn't see him as a monster, especially with his reputation. Just because he never announced it out loud didn't mean that he didn't care for others being around him; he just didn't really have anyone to spend time with.

But now, despite the flaring aggravation that kept rising and falling like tides in his chest, he felt more content than ever. Even though Izaya was within choking range each day he still had Celty and Shinra coming and going. It was almost as if he was a part of a family for a while. It was nice to say the least. But now would determine what happened afterwards. If Izaya pulled off his act he would leave and Shizuo would leave as well. If he couldn't fool Shinra then the two of them would stay.

Finally the doctor, after running between rooms to grab all of the equipment that he hopefully wouldn't need (scalpels and small drills didn't seem necessary for a simple check-up) he finally sat on the carpeted floors on his knees and patted at the plastic sheet, making it crinkle in protest against his fingers. Izaya sighed and stood, sitting down as told on the sheet with little care to the stains on it. It was his blood anyways, it wasn't like he was touching anything too foreign. Celty sat on the now unoccupied couch to watch and motioned for Shizuo to join but he shook his head. He didn't really care to be up close.

To begin, Shinra lifted his palm to Izaya's forehead as a minor test. The moment the skin made contact the doctor flinched and went wide eyed as if he had been jolted with electricity. "You're burning up!" He exclaimed loudly. Shizuo couldn't help but practically see the invisible wince in the informant's mind as a strike was taken against his hopes of finally being able to leave and have control once more.  
"I'm fine, Shinra," the flea sighed out with a soft, carefree smile to help confirm his statement. The doctor shook his head but, though hesitant, continued with his examination, next lifting Izaya's wrist into his hand to inspect it. The flea winced as pressure was put on the fracture but he kept a straight face; he was a little tougher than Shizuo had previously thought after all. "It seems like your wrist is healing pretty quickly, which is good. You still have a little ways to go though before you should risk going out again…" Shinra had started but the expression of the informant was enough to allow his words to trail off and his finish to never complete. What Izaya 'should' do and what he 'had to' do were two completely different things. Nodding with a soft sigh as if accepting the brunette's stubborn will to leave, he continued his examination.

"Alright… I'm going to push on your chest and arms, so tell me if it hurts a lot," Shinra stated as he blinked up excitedly through his glasses like a kid on Christmas. He then began to gently jab at the flea in places that probably weren't random (Shizuo wouldn't know). Every so often he'd earn a wince but, luckily, the raven-haired male kept a straight face. "Izaya, when I say 'tell me if it hurts,' you sort of have to say 'it hurts!' or something." After waiting for a response with a pursed lip and getting none, he kept on before finally…  
"Tch..!"  
The noise snapped Shizuo's mind back to focus as he glanced over quickly to inspect the sound. It was the same as the ones that had echoed through his ears when he was punching the brunette into the wall, which was a bad sign entirely. Izaya would never let anyone hear that he was hurting and had been hit with things five times his weight with no sign of pain. When he actually made a noise it meant that something was seriously wrong. Shinra and Celty were both as slightly stunned as Shizuo was before returning to their steady procedure. "It seems like some of your wounds have reopened after all," the male in the lab coat replied with a disappointed sigh, as if saying that he had wasted his time sewing up tears that would just come undone once more. "Izaya, if you don't tell us when you're in pain then how are we supposed to fix it! If I hadn't done this check on you then you could've bled out! I'll probably have to do another surgery to check the damage and fix it before it gets worse or…"  
"I'm fine, Shinra." And there was that stubborn annoying tone once more, carefree and persistent as always.  
"You're not fine! You're internally bleeding! You could die!"  
"It doesn't hurt!" Shizuo sighed, feeling his mood dropping lower and lower into the infamous red zone as they continued bickering over something so stupid. Why wouldn't he just take the stupid surgery? Was he really that stupid that he'd put his own pride over his life?! Celty glanced behind her at the right moment to see the blonde fuming to himself and quickly threw her fingers across her phone, rushing off of the couch and to him to hold out the tiny screen in his line of sight. 'Calm down, we won't let Izaya die.'  
"That's not it!" He shouted. He didn't care about that flea! His roar attracted the attention of the two in the back though and the room fell silent over than the panting running from Shizuo's mouth as he attempted to control his increasingly building anger. He honestly hardly knew why he was mad, just that he was fuming, his hands clawing at his palms in a gnawing urge to grip and shatter something in them, his eye twitching in its socket as he was denied relief. Shinra, glancing between both the refusing informant and the searing bodyguard finally and hurriedly came up with a solution on his own. "I don't think we have much choice. We can't just let you die, Izaya. Leaving now would be suicide without at least having the internal damage fixed. Celty." The unlicensed doctor nodded to the dullahan and she turned away from Shizuo, nodding her agreement to their short and silent message before running to the back room. The blonde sighed as he attempted to channel his anger out through his tensed muscles, taking deep breaths, the things that hardly ever changed anything worth a damn but would at least help somewhat. Whatever Shinra had in mind, at least he was on Shizuo's side, Celty as well.

When the rider returned with a different, much more familiar medical bag, Izaya jolted to his feet. He had known Shinra for a long time and probably could recognize the supplies from one another, and whatever this one was wasn't something he agreed with. "Izaya, we have to! Shizuo!" Right, it made sense now. Shinra was going to do the surgery anyways, regardless of what the darker haired male had to say against it. Without another word on the matter the blonde quickly peeled his back from the wall, swiped around the couch, and, despite the informant automatically attempting to get away, grabbed Izaya's arms and held them behind his back. It was a wonder that he wasn't crushing the bones even further with how he was still burning with aggravation inside despite his tactics to withstand the anger without ruining something.

Izaya struggled, kicking and spitting out irritated and spiteful words towards the ex-bartender as he attempted with no good luck to break free. Shizuo was far stronger than anyone in Ikebukero and, while the brunette did make a difficult target, he wasn't an exception. It was strange though. Despite the irritation in his expression, the blonde didn't think he had ever really seen Izaya so… panicked. He didn't appear afraid or anxious in any way but there was no doubt about it with the way he could practically feel the informant's heart pounding through his back. What was so bad about surgery? Shizuo used to have to go through it all the time with how many bones he broke in his childhood, it wasn't all that bad. They could trust Shinra as well, which was far beyond what could be said about most doctors.

Shinra, nodding a quick, mental 'thank you' to Shizuo, then unzipped the bag and pulled out a tube with a mask on one end and a strange machine on the other. It was a foreign object of some sort, probably a way to deliver anesthesia faster without having to deal with so much preparation beforehand, perfect for rushed surgeries like he probably had to do daily. Izaya turned his face from the mask, baring his teeth almost like a dog attempting to growl its way out of a situation, but Shizuo easily jerked his head back straight and held it still by soft raven strands of hair until the mask was strapped on tightly. "Don't worry, you'll wake up in no time. Sorry," Shinra said in an all-too-cheerful tone as he usually possessed, though his face was outlined with an apologetic smile to show that he probably did mean his statement. Ruby eyes glared up at him, glinting to be even brighter than usual in the artificial and overly bright light of the overhead fixture before they grew heavy, fluttering slightly. Shizuo let go, laying Izaya's head down on his knee since he doubted it would be comfortable to be laying on a cold, crusty, plastic mat when on the verge of passing out (he later wondered why he even cared of Izaya's comfort. Yet another thing to dig into his far too simple mind). Those bright eyes then found their way to meet the honey-colored ones staring down at him, though the glare had faded away with a sleepiness that no doubt was overwhelming the flea. He was obviously attempting to stay awake with how his eyes would slowly slip shut then blink straight back open but was failing, a soft, barely audible groan running from his throat before the crimson irises were blanketed by his eyelids and didn't peek back out any further.

Once again, Izaya looked unusually un-Izaya like when he slept. Innocent, guiltless, gentle, all the things he wasn't. Even with the mask covering his mouth and nose he seemed entirely undisturbed and his face wasn't mauled by that stupid and infuriating smirk that had followed Shizuo around since high school. He was… almost peaceful in a way that felt strange to pinpoint, because the informant was very rarely ever peaceful at all. Once Shizuo realized that he had been staring at Izaya's sleeping face for probably around thirty seconds he quickly pushed the brunette off of his leg and only half-gently lowered him to lay fully on the mat, rushing to glance around. Shinra was digging through his bag for nothing in particular; Celty was glancing around the room, as if examining if she should paint the sterile white walls anytime soon. He sighed in relief, though a tingling in his intuition mumbled that they probably saw him and were just faking not noticing so that he wouldn't get angry again. He pushed that thought aside. Quickly.

Shinra, who had finished excavating his bag, withdrew his hand with no tool in grip which further proved that Shizuo's intuition was probably more right than not. Noticing that Izaya had finally fallen asleep he smiled with a relieved and almost creepily excited tone as he reached for a particularly large scalpel. He looked like a kid ready to fly down the stairs for Christmas gifts, except the gift was the form beneath him and the motions was the careful but quick and accurate incision created across the flea's already scarred and scraped chest. Honestly the blonde hardly cared at this point. He had seen plenty of blood and gore in his lifetime and now that he wasn't covered in it like the last time he was given the opportunity to watch, he didn't really care if he was in the same room or not. Another cut, then another, each created in certain places and only drawn with the tip of the blade so that none of the sensitive organs below would be slashed in the process. As Shinra worked he began to talk, something he was probably used to. It was a trait he had inherited from his father, who had counselled him as a kid through too many dissections and operations to count. "I'm glad he let me put him to sleep. Last time was bad, watching him wincing every time I made a cut," the doctor said as calmly as if he were discussing some puppy he had seen that day rather than a surgery. "Idiot," Shizuo mumbled, allowing himself to fall back onto the couch next to Celty, his soft growl blowing a few strands of his dyed blonde bangs up from his eyes. Celty began to type, leaning over the couch's arm to show Shinra. The ex-bartender figured it probably wasn't the best idea to distract a doctor in the middle of an operation but didn't say anything; Shinra was no doubt used to it and glanced up, pausing mid-cut to read what she had said with a fully interested expression. When the dullahan retracted her hand the blonde scanned his eyes over her screen. 'He didn't exactly let you do it.'  
"Well at least it happened anyways. If he tried to tough it out again his body could go into shock from the pain or the nerves shooting through to the brain too quickly or…" Shizuo zoned out, lifting his eyes to stare down the ceiling as if it were the bright blue sky that the current weather outdoors hadn't promised, his ears only tuning in to the conversation every so often.

"Izaya probably doesn't like the anesthesia because it's a drug. He doesn't trust many people, especially with things that could put him in a situation to be taken advantage of," the doctor informed the two observers as he placed the bloodied scalpel down and reached for two different tools, a small, pick-like object and a tiny magnifying glass. As his chocolate brown eyes glinted into the rounded glass through his glasses, Shinra continued on without any seriousness or worry at all in his voice. He was no doubt confident in his ability. It was part of the reason Shizuo trusted him, along with him being a childhood friend. It made sense that the flea wouldn't be too happy with the medical drug then, if that were truly the case. Izaya was always in control, and having someone able to knock him out for any specified amount of time was practically selling a piece of that control away through trust, something Shizuo didn't think the informant could even do. Maybe he trusted Shinra, but not enough to allow himself to be put at such a disadvantage by the way he reacted when the doctor had offered the idea of doing surgery anyways. As far as the blonde knew Izaya had never taken any drugs from the beginning, purposefully or not. He didn't ever recall seeing him drink either, despite knowing the bastard for nearly eight years at this point. It was probably for the same reason; he couldn't be his best if he were drunk or messed on something, and if he wasn't at his best then there was a chance that he could lose to someone. Over half the city probably either hated him or saw him as bad luck by this point with rumors spread and the obvious violent spurts between the flea and the 'beast of Ikebukuro' as they called him. One wrong move and there was little doubt that he'd be shot.

As his mind wandered out of his control, Shizuo questioned if there ever was anyone that really saw Izaya as someone that was meaningful in a positive way. He never cared to learn about the flea's parents but knew from Shinra that they went on business trips quite a lot, leaving him at home with his two sisters. Even they didn't care too much for him, having told Shizuo on multiple occasions that they'd help kill their brother as long as they could meet Kasuka. Shinra cared about him… maybe. Enough to save his life, but probably not enough to agree with his questionable actions or to be there for much. It wasn't like Izaya to ask for help either, but was that out of his prideful, self-sufficient career and nature or a piece of the fact that he didn't really have anyone to go to? 'Why are you even thinking about this,' Shizuo groaned to himself, shushing the words in his head and attempting to lose his mind in Shinra's voice as the male rapidly spurted out facts about parts of the body that the blonde hadn't even heard of. All he could really focus on was the ceiling, the faint longing for the relieving nicotine, and the calm and almost childishly innocent expression on his 'enemy's' sleeping face.

**Like always, I'm completely open to opinions ^^ If you have anything you'd specifically like to happen in this story, feel free to leave it in the reviews and I'll try and fit it in (no promises though). Also, if you'd like please tell me what I'm doing well and what I need to improve on. This helps me make the story as great as it can be by keeping the good and leaving out the bad for later chapters. Again, thank you so much for reading and for your patience with me on this chapter. **


	8. Arrogant Flea

**Alright! Motivation for this story has come once again at full blast! Hopefully this chapter will get things rolling once more. Honestly the only reason why I've been demotivated is the fear that I'll slowly start making the characters OOC. I'm doing the best I can to keep them acting as they would but still. Anyways, thank you so much for reading, I can't say it enough. **

**Sakuki-yuu: Thank you! I hope to keep Shizuo's interest growing steadily but slowly. It'll take time for him to accept any feelings, even though he may feel them. ^^ It's great that you enjoyed the chapter, thank you so much.**

**Raven knight01: Thanks! I'm actually planning on using your second idea but in a different way. I don't see either Izaya or Shizuo showing emotions to anyone, especially each other, on purpose. However I do see them slipping up. I have so many ideas thanks to you, haha, they all just ran into my head. The first idea was good as well, just figured it would be difficult to keep Shizuo from strangling Izaya again at times without Shinra and Celty on guard. I'm grateful for your suggestions! They really helped. **

He felt calm. As Shinra went on explaining every technical thing that Shizuo swore couldn't have possibly been taught in high school and using terms that sounded like a foreign language, the blonde strangely felt free of aggravation, more free than he had in a very long while. The chains of guilt had bound him down for so long but, despite the fact that Izaya was still injured and Shizuo's conscience wasn't swept clean yet, he didn't feel the stirring of frustration building up and being restrained in the pit of his chest. After a few minutes of hearing Shinra's schooling fade into a heated but relatively safe debate with Celty there was a soft clink against the window. Then another. Then another. The larger of the two dark clouds Shizuo had seen had finally reached, hovering over Ikebukuro as if cradling the large city, embracing it with the water trickling down the cheap glass of the sliding door. His ears had far since tuned out of the conversation; he never did well in science and honestly he didn't feel like pitching into a playful argument that had little to do with him. Instead he simply watched the rain with honey eyes, tracing the progress of the racing droplets down the glass panel, watching as the once transparent door faded with condensation to a foggy grey. It was entrancing, staring off into the faded shapes of the city surrounding through the window, not a thought on his mind for the first time in a while. It was nice.

All of the subtle noises besides the soft clapping of the rain on the apartment's roof softened to a silence though as a faint groan ran from the raven-haired male's slightly parted lips. Three heads (Two, since Celty didn't really have a head) turned to focus down on the informant who had previously been sleeping. His expression, still deceivingly innocent even to Shizuo, was tightened with a strained look. His eyes squeezed shut, losing their peacefully soft rest, his opened palm closing as his fingers curled into a weak fist. "He's awake," Shinra muttered with a smile as if it wasn't obvious to everyone else in the room. He rose to his feet, running around the mat and crouching beside his patient, grinning down like a child inspecting their work on a fifth-grade science experiment. The blonde held his breath reasonlessly in impatient hesitation before, very slowly and lazily, crimson red eyes flickered open.

Izaya looked exhausted. His eyes, which usually burned with passion and excitement for whatever scheme he was coming up with or was mid-way through, were faded with a sleepy cloud cast over them, resembling somehow the same dull calmness as the foggy window Shizuo had just been staring into. He slowly focused up on the brunette hovering over him with sparkling eyes, no doubt still out of it despite being awake and functional. At least Shinra hadn't put him in a coma or something, the bodyguard thought. He knew that the false doctor knew what he was doing but… with a novice grin like that, Shinra didn't look nearly as experienced as he was.

"Where..?" Izaya slowly mumbled, his words barely legible as he appeared to be attempting to keep his heavy eyes from slipping closed again each time he blinked. It was… strange to say the least. Hearing Izaya's voice in such a weak and defenseless tone made him seem almost like a completely different person, let alone how… innocent he appeared already. His bangs, midnight black in contrast to the starch white sheet below him, were dusted over his forehead carelessly. Shizuo was right on his first assumption; Izaya's hair had grown just slightly with the few months he was underground.

Quickly realizing that he was staring again the blonde darted his head back to the window, attempting to focus on it rather than on the male beside him despite an unexplainable difficulty. The flea was just off guard, he thought repeatedly, convincing himself to stop considering that Izaya might not be so bad after all. A quick run-through of some unfortunately unforgettable memories was enough to do the trick. With only a few more moments passed he didn't feel a single care for the informant. He hated him. He. Hated. Him. Hate. The word cycled through his head in a repetition that he felt somewhat unwilling to lean towards. What was wrong with him?

After a second or two Shinra calmly broke the very short pause in speech before replying slowly and clearly, probably a tactic that helped somewhat to make words more clear to delirious patients. "You're at my apartment. Celty and Shizuo are here, too. How do you feel?" But Izaya didn't answer the question. As Shinra spoke of the blonde his eyes flickered with something hard to understand, some form of emotion that Shizuo had never seen on someone normally so collected. It was there and, within a second, it was gone, replaced once again by the dead tired and slightly confused expression traced upon his face prior to the doctor's words. There was a pause before ruby eyes drifted from their focus on the male closest to him and instead positioned themselves to stare up at the dull white ceiling, his eyes dilating as they zoomed in just slightly too close to the overhead light above. "Did I lose..?" Was his next question. The words were like a stab in the chest when Shizuo had always sworn that he would feel victorious, making Izaya admit or even consider that he had fallen from his stuck-up tower of arrogance to the rock bottom. Was his mind too fogged to understand fully what Shinra had said? To notice that Shizuo was sitting right there listening? Maybe this was why Izaya detested anesthesia. He couldn't control his words or mind, the two things that kept him stable, when he was under influence like this. He was weak like this, like a lost child in how his eyes wandered around, searching for something despite nothing being new to the room that he hadn't seen before the surgery. It was weird. But despite himself, Shizuo couldn't help but somewhat feel apologetic for some reason. He hadn't done anything, if anyone it was Shinra who had forced the sleeping gas onto the informant, but he looked so freaking _helpless, _it wasn't normal, especially for Izaya.

"No," the doctor replied to the dazed male, shaking his head despite his words being a partial lie. Shizuo had won, just not at that exact moment. He wasn't going to bring it up any further though; he didn't feel like saying much of anything now that his mind had started digging for things to think about. The flea always caused him to overthink. It wasn't like his thoughts ever got anywhere, Shizuo himself knew he wasn't all that bright compared to the geniuses he hung around on a daily basis. "You didn't lose," Shinra continued. "You just got injured so we want to keep you here to make sure that you won't get into trouble."

"I'm fine, Shinra." Shizuo almost laughed at this. Fine? Izaya's voice held a tone of oblivious confidence to it despite how completely wrong his statement was considering his circumstance. He was dreary and couldn't even currently lift his hand higher than a foot off the ground, let alone get up on his own. His words sounded old, as if he had said them many times. Was it out of habit that the informant automatically pushed off any damage on himself? 'What an idiot,' Shizuo muttered mentally to himself, though the words immediately shot another tiny wave of guilt into him once more. Maybe he had hit his head or something, caring for the flea even mildly enough to not enjoy his weakness. This should be a victory. Why was it almost irritating to see Izaya hardly able to move for himself? On a normal basis he would probably laugh in his face and get verbal (and possibly physical) revenge for everything Izaya had ruined for him. His school life, his many jobs, his temper, everything had been shredded up by the stupid raven-haired male just _playing around with him._ Why didn't he feel angry at all anymore about it?

Looking down, Shizuo realized that those foggy crimson eyes that reflected the artificial light from the ceiling above them were now peering straight at him. Blinking awkwardly, with little clue on how to respond or what to say, he just sat there and stared right back. After a few moments though the red orbs were hidden beneath heavy eyelids as the flea sleepily mumbled out, "You must really care a lot to still be here, Shizu-chan."  
"Damn it…!" And there it was, finally the temper that had been annoyingly withdrawn from him came flaring back with just a single sentence of usual teasing from the informant. Right as he was reaching behind him to grab the lamp stand within reach Celty quickly lunged down from her resting position on the couch, gripping his wrist tightly and shaking her helmet as if there were a head underneath, quickly attempting to convince Shizuo from slamming the lamp straight into that cocky smir…

His hand slowly relaxed from its tight grip, fingers leaving deep dents in the cheap lamp's pole as he turned back to see that obnoxious expression and instead saw the sleeping, innocent male from before. 'He's faking it,' was Shizuo's first thought but, after a few moments of hesitation, he saw that the previously nearly still rise and fall of Izaya's chest had slowed even further. His fingers had released once more and, as before, he appeared as gentle as if he had been sleeping for hours on end. Whatever. He'd probably just go out for a smoke to get rid of the throbbing of his muscles as they begged to unleash their fury on the surrounding room and people nearby.

After 'assisting' Shinra with bringing Izaya back to the spare bedroom (More like picking him up and carrying him; he was unusually warm, probably still having the fever), the blonde stepped out onto the concrete balcony to attempt to light his cigarette despite the still determinedly drizzling skies swiping out each flicker of the lighter's flame. After a few tries he once again gave up. It wasn't worth it, he was just wasting lighter fluids on a lost cause. Shizuo shoved the balcony's door open as gently as possible, though the glass still rattled in its frame. He wanted to sleep, to ward off the temper that was swirling subtly in the pit of his gut with a dream of his life possibly being normal, calm, peaceful with no distractions. His body finally listened. A few moments after his back made contact with the obsidian-colored couch his eyes slipped closed and he himself relaxed into a relieving sleep.

But, as nearly always, the world was out to get him. "Shizuo! Shizuo, wake up! It's an emergency!" He heard Shinra calling in a desperate voice. He was being shaken, jerked around by two hands tightly gripping his shoulders. Unless the doctor had a death wish there was no way he'd be stupid enough to wake the blonde so furiously from a nice rest. "What the hell do you want..?!" The ex-bartender finally growled out, irritation growing as his attempt to ignore the voice and return to the peace of unconsciousness was growing more and more difficult to reach. Taking the cue, Shinra quickly (thankfully) let go, stepping back quickly but still pestering vigorously with the unusually urgent tone. "Izaya's gone!"

In a moment he had gone from laying down, eyes squeezed shut in a heavy urge to avoid everything outside of the dream he didn't even remember at this point to standing, tensed and ready to run out of the house. "What?!" There was no way. There was no way that Izaya could've possibly… He wasn't stupid, he wouldn't run away if he were this messed up. But the informant was never really put under the influence of anesthesia before, not with how greatly he usually denied it. He probably didn't think he was bad off anymore, he probably, arrogantly, figured he could handle it. They hadn't put the collar back on, Shinra more worried about him getting a good flow of air to his lungs after such a quick and unprepared surgery.  
"I went to his room around ten minutes ago to give him medicine to help him sleep in case he was in pain and he was gone! He must've jumped out the window!"  
"And you didn't consider _locking_ the damned window?!" Shizuo was fuming. Izaya could, no he WOULD die out there. Everyone who had been a victim to his games, which was a good chunk of the dangerous portion of the city's population, wanted revenge. He couldn't protect himself, not if he could barely walk straight. It was a miracle that he had even managed to get down from such a high apartment in his state. How stupid could he be to leave?! _You care about him. _A voice pursued in Shizuo's head. He quickly shut it up with a threat so deep even he was surprised at the vulgarity of it. He was pissed off. "I'm going out to get him," He snarled as he, without another word, stormed towards the front door and flung it open so forcefully that it flew off the hinges. Hardly caring the blonde simply dropped the cheap wood to the floor. "Right!" Shinra called after, obviously somewhat disappointed with the faint of his door but being a good enough friend to put Izaya's health to heart over the house's current shape. Doors could be recovered. A life couldn't, if worst came to worst. "Celty is going to try to find him near his apartment in case he went there! I'll look around the park!" Shizuo didn't respond, not caring where they went. He'd find the flea and kick his ass for freaking everyone out so bad. But something in the back of his mind told him, as he fiercely shoved his foot down to impale a puddle in his way on the sidewalks outside, that he'd feel somewhat relieved to find Izaya safe. He was getting soft and it was stupid, but he didn't have time to think about that now. Rushing down the soaked, chilly night streets of Ikebukuro, Shizuo Heiwajima felt the burst of familiar adrenaline fueling his quick paces and furious breath as he stormed down the empty pavement, searching for any sign of a raven-haired informant with a cocky smile and teasing announcement playfully making his steady way down the alleys.


	9. Exhausted

**Agh! Yet again I missed the date I was planning to upload this! ;-; Life has been hectic, but this story is being bumped up on my priority list for sure.**

**Kimiyu: Haha, I'm glad you like it! It makes me really happy to see! **

****Idiot. Freaking idiot. Within seconds of mindlessly rushing down the street that Shinra and Celty's apartment building was positioned on Shizuo had concluded that Izaya was in no way smart as everyone thought he was. An act like this was stupid, selfish even to have wasted everyone's time and worry. He was pissed off, his hand aching to grip something, to punch something, his body's hunger for action only stifled by the semi-satisfying pounding of his feet stamping down the pavement below him. Why was he worried? He didn't care. He didn't feel like answering the billion psychological questions that flared into his mind. Once he found Izaya he would kill him, it was decided, though the blonde knew that he wouldn't be able to bring himself to do it. Shinra had worked too hard on him, it would be a waste of the doctor's skills if he died. That was it. That was the only reason why he was worried. Though that reason didn't satisfy him, he didn't ask any more. He honestly didn't want to know, and by this point he honestly just refused to care.

It was dark and the night air was both chilly and humid, the deep navy skies turned a dark grey color as if artificial itself. Each building loomed a shadow that made the streets seem even darker and more ominous but Shizuo was never afraid of the city, whether the sun was up or not. There were few people on the streets, few people to glance in judgmental pondering as to why the infamous beast of Ikebukuro were running so desperately to a destination unknown to even himself. He honestly had no clue where Izaya would be. The flea went everywhere, whether hidden in the crevices of the alleyways or contrasting in his dark clothing with the crowds of the busy streets. There was no specific destination he showed up in, he was literally everywhere. Everywhere watching, everywhere listening, and everywhere causing crap. He, Shizuo assumed by previous sightings, did seem to have a habit of resting on the rooftops of skyscrapers, but there was no way that he could climb that many stairs in his condition. Of course it'd make sense that he'd be troublesome as anything to find; that's how he wanted it to be. Damn him. Damn everything. Damn the entire city for being so freaking big and filled with so many freaking hiding places. Even with the three of them looking it would take forever to search the entire place.

He kept running, not breaking as his lungs had thankfully grown accustomed to having to overwork and weren't burning for air, his legs used to the extra effort necessary on a daily basis and not stinging with soreness. Thanks to the regular exercise his overall life pressed on him Shizuo didn't have to stop for a break or a breath. This would speed things up, if only a little. He heard voices in the alleyway ahead, skidding to a slow pace but not coming to a complete stop. Peeking around the corner he noted that it was only a small group of Yellow Scarves huddled around each other, muttering whatever stupid and overall meaningless scheme they had. The Yellow Scarves could be bad when they wanted to be, but he doubted Izaya would even have to try if he got into a fight with them. Then again though, Izaya was probably still delirious, and Izaya was still injured.

It was getting colder so steadily and quickly that Shizuo could feel the temperature decreasing from a general chill to a gust of wind creating a shiver through his thin white sleeves. Hopefully the flea hadn't darted out shirtless as he was while he was being worked on by Shinra, the blonde thought. If he had that stupid parka-like jacket thing then he'd be fine, but without it he might get even further sick with the mist from the recent rain and the cold that continued to grow less and less bearable. He turned a corner. Then another. Then another. By this point Shizuo doubted that Izaya could've gotten this far in his condition. The informant had probably taken a different route, that was it. He was probably waltzing down the street at that moment, glad for the freedom that he hadn't been granted for quite a while.

Slowing to a halt the bartender finally allowed himself a breath, though he wished he hadn't. The cold air was sucked hastily into his lungs, freezing them from the inside out and producing a feeble cough. His lungs weren't exactly strong anymore, not with all the smoking he did, but it didn't matter. A cough wasn't anything compared to what he had had before, he hardly even felt anything but mild discomfort as his chest tightened with a stinging feeling in his throat from the frozen air. He turned, starting back the way he came. If Celty or Shinra had found the flea they would've called him without a doubt. His silent, messageless phone therefor declared that Izaya was still somewhere out there. Celty was heading for the raven-haired male's apartment, had she arrived yet? Was he not there? It had been around twenty minutes by now. Maybe the police were just chasing her around again. Who knew.

With a sigh Shizuo was just about to round the corner to try a different street when his tuned hearing caught a very faint voice through the general silence. It was too feeble to hear the words but it was the tone of a male. Izaya? Half of him wanted to keep walking. It was probably just the Yellow Scarves or some other color gang giggling about whatever theft they had achieved, or some high school kid talking to himself. But the other half of him considered the chance that it might just be the flea and with an irritated growl of lacking irritation he spun yet again to observe whatever lifeform was speaking in the alley.

As he drew closer the words were far more coherent and actually made sense to his observant ears. "You don't know how lucky we are," the man spoke. It didn't sound much like Izaya anymore, Shizuo's hopes dropping and his aggravation rising as he pleaded that his backtracking wasn't in vain. It was more likely someone who got a good deal on something, or, again, a Yellow Scarf that actually got somewhere, but…. He had to check. It would be even further irritating if Izaya really were here and Shizuo ignored the sign and left anyways.  
There was a thudding noise and a groan that was too distant to make out. Someone was getting beat up? He walked a little faster.  
"Here we were trying to find a way to finally catch you just for you to fall down right in front of our feet!" A laugh then another thud. The cough that followed was raspy and violent. "It looks like someone got to you already before we did though. What a shame. Don't worry though, we'll screw you up nice and good for making us lose our jobs like that."

Shizuo rounded the corner to see both what he had least expected and what he had partially (though refusing to admit it) worried about. Izaya was being held up off the ground, pressed against the wall of a building with a huge man gripping the v-neck grey shirt so tightly that it rose up slightly to expose the fresh stitches on his stomach. His eyes burned with a fiery crimson passion despite his body refusing to respond, a piercing glare and the soft traces of a tired smirk drawn on the informant's expression despite how bad his situation appeared to be. The large man was accompanied by a slightly smaller one, though both were both obviously physically stronger and taller than the weakened flea. On a normal case Shizuo had no doubt that Izaya could break free and get away with a decent amount of revenge and teasing in the way he did it, but now there was little chance. The black-haired male's hands hung limply at his sides, and though his eyes were powerful they were heavy with a tired fog cast over them. He didn't appear to have the energy to speak.

"Kiyo, are… you sure we should be doing this?" The second, slightly smaller man asked hesitantly, earning a glare from his friend. "You can't seriously be backing out now. Look! He's already half dead just waiting for us! We can get him back for ruining our careers like he did!" This seemed to be enough. The second man drew a knife out of his pocket, flicking it so that the blade pointed outward, glinting in the street light's looming glow. The blade grew closer and closer to an informant that wasn't struggling, on that could hardly move. "Let's start with those eyes, they piss me off," the larger of the two growled. The knife then raised, coming closer to the left ruby-colored iris that quickly closed in attempt to avoid what was unavoidable. The point came closer, closer, about to pierce before…

"AGH!" Izaya was dropped to the ground, flinching at the impact before glancing up quickly to address whoever had screamed, his eyes widening in surprise that was rare to see in the informant. The larger of the two man had darted around only to be met by a fist making contact with his face so powerfully that his huge mass was sent flying out of the alley. His friend was already on the ground dazed, a little blood and saliva splattered across his chin from where he no doubt coughed it up when he was punched in the gut. And in the middle of the two large, collapsed figures, was Shizuo Heiwajima, hardly even panting after the quick and ruthless attack.

Izaya glanced away, glaring halfheartedly and sleepily at the concrete he was collapsed on, muttering a simple nickname that was far too familiar and strangely not as annoying as it usually was. "Shizu-chan…" But the blonde refused to listen storming forward and crouching down in front of his 'rival,' faces only a few inches apart. "What the _hell _were you thinking?!" He shouted, teeth gritting in frustration as he resisted all urge to start pounding at Izaya himself. "If I hadn't showed up in time you would've lost your eyes and probably a hell of a lot more! You're so damn stupid, don't you realize how many people were worried about you?!" He was hardly listening to himself speak, ranting in a yelling tone that didn't seem to faze the male in front of him. The flea was probably used to it by this point, but that didn't stop Shizuo from continuing. "Shinra and Celty have done EVERYTHING to help you and you're too ungrateful to even listen to them! Stupid freaking flea, next time you run away like that I'll…!"

"Izaya!" The blonde was rudely interrupted as Shinra rounded the corner and rushed into the alleyway, both hazel and crimson eyes glancing to the intruder warily for different reasons. Shinra didn't seem to notice though, crouching down besides Shizuo with his chocolate eyes wide with surprise and relief. "I was so worried! Celty called, she said that while she was on her way back from your apartment, which was empty, she heard Shizuo screaming and was worried that he was beating someone up! I'm so glad that you're okay!" It took him a moment before realizing that they weren't going to reply, the doctor then glancing around the alleyway. After seeing the two unconscious forms on the ground he clicked two and two together. "You know…" He said, quieter this time, more in a thoughtful tone. "Ikebukuro can get pretty dangerous at night, especially for someone like you. You shouldn't run off when you're not at your best." Izaya sighed, rubbing his left eye, which was probably pretty uncomfortable after nearly being gouged out, and closing his right. "I get it," was his tired and careless reply. Shizuo gritted his teeth at how uncaring the flea sounded after they had thrown in so much effort but Shinra's glance of understanding warning caused him to hold back once more, rising to his feet and brushing the scuffs of dirt off of his black pants. "Let's go. It's late," he himself muttered halfheartedly. With a nod from Shinra, who extended a hand to help Izaya up, the three slowly started back to the apartment, the two ignoring Shinra as the doctor ran his mouth once more. They were both too out of it and exhausted to really listen, one thing that they both, at least, had in common at the moment.


	10. Confusion

**Hello! With Spring Break finally here I feel like I'll be able to update quite a bit. I hope so, at least, this chapter is where something happens! I hope I'm writing it correctly, I'm a little new to fanfiction, especially the romancy fun stuff, so I'm really grateful for everyone who reads. ^^ I hope everyone has a great Spring Break. **

**07 NIGHT: You know the moment I saw your review I was so inspired into writing another chapter right then and there but couldn't, it was horrible XD. I'm glad that you like the long stories! I've been attempting to make each chapter longer but with the limited time I've been able to write that's been a bit difficult ;-;. This chapter will probably be rather short too, but I'm digging through a number of ideas for this story and once I pick one they'll get much longer ^^. XD And I can so see Shizuo chasing Izaya with roses, though I can also picture him getting frustrated after a while and throwing them at him, haha. **

**Kimiyu: Thanks for the read! ^o^ **

**Update: This chapter will be short and hardly eventful, however I do have a plan for the next few chapters after this one so it should get better, updated more, and the chapters longer. The only time I've had to write lately has been late at night so I'm a little tired and not quite up to my usual standard, but soon I'll be able to write more during the day again and update more frequently. **

They reached the apartment, Shinra having quieted down somewhat to make for an almost awkward walk as the three of them, a trio that would normally not be caught near each other in public, walked down the shadow-blanketed streets in a row formation. The flea was silent. Shizuo was silent. Shinra had finally realized that the few grunts that the two gave every now and then didn't mean that they were listening and went quiet. It was natural, of course, to hear only the noises of countless cars rushing along the larger streets nearby, their horns and wheels' screams dimmed by the fact that the blonde had heard those same noises over and over for years now. But what wasn't natural was that he was here, standing within two feet of Izaya, with only a small urge to strangle him. Was it because he sympathized that the informant had nearly gotten mauled in a way too gruesome to really consider? Or was it because he was getting weak? 'Probably both,' he grunted to himself mentally. Even his thoughts hardly wanted to have a conversation.

He felt exhausted, mentally drained, despite hardly having done anything but run around a few blocks (which was nothing compared to his normal chases with the flea). It was stupid. But then again, so were a lot of things that were on his mind. Shizuo found that it was somewhat easier to just stop thinking for the time being. It wasn't like his thoughts were leading anywhere other than to frustrating dead ends that reminded him of the one that he chased the raven-haired male into on that fateful day nearly two weeks prior to the present. Things had changed so much so quickly. Only two weeks ago he would've given anything to hear of Izaya's death on a news report or something, to just grab him and choke him to death to end his irritating and selfish schemes. Now, though… Now it was like there was a different Izaya. This one still had his arrogant, frustrating voice and he still wore that stupid jacket all the time and his eyes were still the color of the blood he's probably spilled indirectly on multiple occasions... So why did Shizuo feel they were so different? Was it because, now as they walked back to the apartment, he wasn't talking? He wasn't smiling in that aggravating grin and he wasn't attempting to get the ex-bartender flattened by whatever large vehicle came down the road. With how dark his clothes and hair were it was almost as if he blended into the shadows of the midnight sky, the moonlight blocked by the city's massive skyscrapers so that not even his ruby eyes and pale skin were caught in the glint. He was quiet, which was unnatural, and he wasn't scheming anything… which honestly was even more unnerving than if he were to spin around right at that moment and attempt to stab Shizuo in the gut.

When they reached the apartment Celty's bike was already in its parking spot, indicating that the black rider was already home and probably waiting for them to return and explain what had happened while she was gone. However when Shinra twisted the key and pushed open the door she was nowhere in sight, the large, multi-purpose room free of anyone. "She probably went to sleep," Shinra claimed with a soft sigh, rubbing the bridge of his nose at the base of his glasses as if scolding the blonde and brunette silently, knowing that the both of them could easily smash him like a bug in some form of the word if he said anything directly to them. Even if he had though he realized that there was a high chance that neither of them would even notice. Turning back he saw that both the gentle brown and crimson red eyes were faded of focus, blinking down at the floor in mindless thought. Shinra smiled at this, figuring maybe they were tired as well. He hardly knew what had happened in the alley but… whatever it was, it must've worn them down somehow. "We should go to bed too so we don't keep Celty awake," he said cheerfully despite having the subconscious knowledge that the only one not being dead silent in the room at the moment was himself. "Come on, Izaya," the doctor kindly requested but there was no movement towards the bedroom. The informant instead fell back onto the couch, blinking at Shinra without a smile, without any false 'I'm okay,' without anything. "I won't run off again. Good night, Shinra," he simply said, clarifying his will to be alone quite easily with how direct and plain his voice was. Taking the hint the scientist waved to Shizuo, sure that the blonde would figure out where to sleep or how to move Izaya if needed, and left the room.

It was awkward. Shizuo stood at the side of the couch wondering what to say, hardly being able to just ignore his thoughts and fall asleep if the flea was taking up his usual resting space. Normally he'd force the informant off but every few seconds when he made his mind up to do so he'd turn his head and see that unusually blank expression staring at the floor. Izaya was rarely dull like this. He always had either a scowl of some sorts or (more likely) a cocky grin. Now… Had what happened really messed up him that badly? Shizuo was sure that this couldn't have been the first time someone had tried to attack him or gotten a little too close. Was it just the fact that this was the first time Izaya couldn't really defend himself in that situation? Too much thinking again. On the freaking flea of all people. Why did he care about how Izaya felt anyways? Steeling his denying mind he stepped forward and pointed his thumb over his shoulder towards the closed guestroom door. "Get up," the blonde demanded, ignoring his mind furiously wishing he hadn't said anything. No reply. No movement. "I said get up," he growled a little more aggressively. "You don't have the right to mope around after…"  
"Oh no, I'm not moping," the raven-haired male finally responded, a sting to his tone as he interrupted the larger of the two. "Maybe I just don't feel like moving, had you ever thought of that, Shizu-chan?" He should've expected some amount of sass and aggravating sarcasm from Izaya but for some reason it came off as surprising… and really freaking irritating. "I'll throw you out the window before you try to cause any more trouble." Shizuo finally raised his voice, done with trying to keep quiet for the hosts' sakes, his anger rising. Why was Izaya so damn difficult?! But still there was something in him trying to tug him from half strangling the guy! "I'm sure Celty wouldn't appreciate her window being broken. They already know you're a monster, do you want them to treat you like one as well… Shizu-chan?"  
He was done.

Storming forward he leaned down and grabbed Izaya's v-neck shirt, the fabric crumping into his fist as he yanked the informant forward in an attempt to jerk him to standing. That feeling in him trying to get him to stop could wait. The realization that Izaya's wince came from already having his shirt grabbed like this could wait. Any thought at all could wait. For now he wasn't thinking and it felt damn good… until Izaya pulled back.

The informant's strength hardly matched the 'beast of Ikebukuro''s at all but it was just enough to tip Shizuo's already unsteady balance to make the blonde fall forward. What neither of them predicted, however, was exactly where the ex-bartender would land.

Izaya felt something somewhat heavy pressing down against him, the slightly claustrophobic tightness between whatever was on top of him and the back of the couch pressing up at him being uncomfortable. His eyes slowly opened from the wince in preparation to be hit to try and distinguish whatever the warm, almost invitingly so, object was that was pushing against him. Had Shizuo thrown one of Celty's chairs down or something? His mind was in a fog, delirious from whatever the horrible gas was that Shinra had thrown into his system. He wasn't stable enough for anything to click… until he actually gained the control to look up.

Shizuo had fallen, gripping onto the couch for support but it not being enough, instead dropping to his knees over what would normally be plain fabric and what was now Izaya's shocked expression. He could see, for quite possibly the first time in the eight years of knowing the flea, pure, undisguised shock in the ruby eyes that glistened brightly in the overhead lamp's artificial light. Soft looking, obsidian colored strands of hair were scattered over a pale forehead and the informants chest was rising and falling in deep, steady pants as the two of them both tried to figure out what exactly had happened for them to wind up like this. It was the first time that Izaya stopped thinking entirely, if even for a split second. It was the first time that Shizuo actually noticed the latter slip up… and they were both stunned. Shizuo felt his left hand pressing against something soft and padded which he quickly realized was the hood of Izaya's jacket, his right fingers closed around an object for support that happened to be Izaya's arm which was warm through his dark sleeve, probably because of a fever that still remained. He felt a steady breath running in small motions just barely brushing across his cheek every time the informant exhaled, he smelled something fresh and clean, he… What was going on with him?

Quickly realizing fully the position he was in the blonde clumsily managed to his feet and stumbled back, feeling a slightly heat in his face out of embarrassment and an anger burning towards himself with how his heart was for some reason racing as if he were in the midst of an adrenaline rush from a fight. Knowing how perceptive Izaya was he quickly turned away to try and hide his face, the last sight seen in that direction was the informant still as wide-eyed as before, blinking up at him speechlessly for quite possibly the first time ever. He always had some comment, whether sarcastic or jabbing, rude or cocky, but now he didn't even seem as if he could form words at all. "Fine, stay there then. Sorry," Shizuo muttered, feeling the awkwardness of the situation arise once more and dropping his case, quickly turning to go to the room where Izaya normally slept. He didn't want to wait for the brunette to get his bearings together, knowing and regretting the time in the probably close future where the informant would start either getting him back for the humiliation or teasing him non-stop over it. He was exhausted mentally, confused entirely, and overall just wanted to stop thinking for good. Falling back on the bed, flipping the pillow so that he wouldn't have to smell the nice scent that he smelled before when he was that close to Izaya when he laid his head on it, and ignoring the slight chill that ran through him from not having a blanket Shizuo closed his eyes and demanded of his body to let him rest, the stupid thing actually listening to him for once. He'd deal with this later. But, though most of him wished it had never happened, a part of him, that same stupid part of him that always argued with him, denied it.

**I'm really sorry, I understand that this chapter is terribly short and lacking in detail but my mind is fried and I didn't want to keep yall waiting any longer than I already have. It should start getting better next chapter on. Thank you so much for reading, have a good night.**


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